Borger Blessings

Who is your master?

2012-01-29T07:29:00.001-07:00

We all submit to someone or something. The question is, "Who have you made your master?" Who or what do you let control your life?

Some believe they are intellectuals and too smart to be hoodwinked by religious beliefs. They want proof or it must be wrong. Yet, many of these same individuals place faith in a concept that somehow inert material with no energy or life somehow spontaneously combusted into the biggest explosion ever. An explosion so large that it would destroy everything if it happened today came out of material smaller than a grain of sand with no external forces causing it to happen. Seems like that will be hard to replicate. But they continue on in faith that it happened all the while claiming faith is ignorance. Personally, I believe that God created everything and if He chose to start the process that way it does not make Him any less than He is. The main point is that their ideology has become their master.

Some allow entertainment or technology to become your masters. That which you spend the most time doing is your master.

I propose to you that Jesus is supposed to be our master and we are to be His bond slave. A bond slave is a person who sells himself to the master. He then serves his master obeying every commandment. I believe that many in the church, including myself, have misunderstood the salvation process.

In Romans 3:21-28 we read that we are justified freely by faith not by works. We are told that salvation is a free gift. All we have to do is believe and accept it. I'm sorry but that is wrong. It is true that we can't earn salvation by anything we do and that Christ gave it freely, but there is a catch. There is a cost.

Matthew 16:24 Then Jesus said to his disciples,“Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me."

When we accept salvation we must die to ourselves and become a bond slave to Christ. It is a life for a life. Jesus gave us His life and we give him ours. Learning to be Jesus slave doesn't usually happen overnight. But we must do everything we can to learn and allow our new master to teach us and disciple us.

Think about this. How can we exist in Heaven which is a perfect eternity if we do not allow God to perfect us? We can't accept the gift of salvation and continue living for ourselves and continue sinning and think that we can exist in Heaven. It is very clear that we are called to follow Jesus and that He is to be more important than anything else in our life.

You should work where you work because Jesus wants you there. When are at work you are there to represent Jesus. You work hard because you represent Jesus. You are polite and fair because you represent Jesus. Most of all you try and build relationships to provide you the opportunity to have a positive impact on their lives ans because you choose to love them.

You should pick your house because Jesus wants you to minister to that neighborhood.

You begin to do everything for the glory of God. You give up your selfish desires. If you don't then you have not made Jesus your master.

What is our goal? Heaven or relationship?

2012-01-18T12:21:00.000-07:00

As a church we are currently working through the "Not a Fan" series. One step that they suggest is DTR. Define the Relationship. In other words what is your relationship with Jesus based on?

I see two possibilities. Jesus is your ticket to Heaven (eternal reward) or Jesus is the goal.

Think about it. Since man was created we have tried to find a way to get what we find to be enjoyable. Many of us can picture another reality (afterlife) where basically we get everything we need to be happy. That hope is all that keeps us going. At one time that meant following over 600 laws and sacrificing animals. Then Jesus came along and changed the game. Now He is the answer.

Before Jesus everyone knew what the rules were. They had control over their destiny by following those rules and if they failed then they knew what they had to do to correct it and get back on track for their reward.

Jesus came along and told them that they had it all wrong and that he was the only way to get the reward. Soon everyone started making up rules for following Jesus. Wait a minute. Do you get that?

Moses started off with 10 rules. Do these things and you will be living like you are supposed to. But man had to clarify what that meant. How do you keep the Sabbath Holy? You can't walk over 'x' amount of distance. You can't cook. How do we do all these other things? Before you know it they had over 600 ways to do the right thing or not do the wrong thing. You were the best if you followed all of them.

After Jesus left people started trying to figure out how they were going to do what Jesus wanted. They started coming up with rules. Go to church every Sunday. Tithe 10% of everything you make. Don't swear. Some churches say you can't drink alcohol, or dance, or go to movies. Some churches had it so that if you paid the priest a penance than they would forgive your sins. Some said only priest could read the Bible. Some like to think that we have to do church a certain way to make it count.

If your focus is an eternal reward then you are viewing Jesus as the ticket or resource for achieving your goal. You are in control of your destiny and you just have to do enough to keep Jesus happy so He will save you. Why don't we steal from other people? Because it would make Jesus mad and then I lose my ticket to heaven. If this is how you are living then you are living a tortured life because you continue to fail. You know you messed up when you failed. Then you have pray to Jesus to forgive you, hoping that you didn't go to far this time. Perhaps you think that if you prayed to Jesus once to save you then you have a ticket that can't be taken away. You figure you are safe, but even so you try and to what is right.

Allow me to introduce you to a better idea. Don't focus on your eternal reward. Focus on Jesus. Jesus is the goal. When you follow rules or you find ways to please Jesus to get your reward you are still in control. You can be who you were meant to be right now. The key? Give complete control to Jesus. Once Jesus is your entire focus everything else falls into place. You start doing the right things because you want to and because you are doing for Jesus not to try and earn something. When you give Jesus complete control, everything you do in life is for Jesus. Your work is no longer your work. It is now your mission field. You are in that place to be an example and witness to those who work there. Your home is no longer your home. It is a place where you bring people in to build relationships so that you can be a witness and example. Your school is no longer your school. It is your mission field.

When everything you are doing is for Jesus you are able to handle anything. There is the key. Heaven is living in perfect relationship with God. You can experience a taste of heaven here on earth. All you have to do is give everything you have to Jesus. Then you can live with joy regardless of what happens. Will it still hurt? Yes, but you will still have joy. You will still struggle, but it is different.

It also usually does not happen over night. Just as with our children, often times the only way for us to learn a lesson is to suffer the consequences of our actions. Through suffering comes understanding. When Jesus disciplines us so that we will learn a lesson, it is often uncomfortable. When we give Jesus complete control of our lives we will go from being disciplined in one area to the next; it doesn't stop.

Stop wishing and hoping for heaven. Stop trying to use Jesus like a pawn to get what you want. Instead enter into a real relationship with Jesus. Give him control of your life and then you will find joy because you will be who God intended for you to be. Don't worry if you fail from time to time. It is a part of the learning process. The main thing is that when Jesus has control you learn from it and it strengthens you. It also takes practice to let Jesus have full control. If Jesus is not in control and you fail then you will follow the rules and ask forgiveness so you can keep your ticket. If that is your life then you will be miserable.

By the way, all those rules....The ones you should follow come naturally because you will be doing it out of love.

Peace

2012-01-08T21:45:00.001-07:00

This one may sound kind of philosophical, and I suppose it is, but here it is. You will never have peace when your peace depends on that which is outside you. Life can't bring you peace. No one else will ever bring you peace. Life will bring you struggles and tribulations. Life will being much sorrow and pain, but if your peace comes from God then you can have peace no matter what is happening.

You have to be like the water droplet. Your surroundings are constantly changing your shape and form; but they can't change who you really are. The water droplet may become a part of a lake or a river or rise in a mist of steam or ice in the arctic; but it is still the same water droplet. As people we end up in different jobs or life situations than we ever thought possible. Often we think that we have missed our chance to be who we were meant to be. That is not true. We were called to be a child of God and no matter how life has shaped us, we will always be called to be a child of God. Even if life has changed our make up a little bit we can still serve God.

Peace comes from knowing that we are where God wants us and accepting that as what is best for us. When you accept that then you have peace. If you do not have peace then you are either where God does not want you or you have not accepted where God has placed you.

Once you are in the right place and accept it, then you can handle anything life might throw at you.

Are you Happiest when you are cranky and does God hate you?

2012-01-04T13:07:00.000-07:00

What I am discovering is that a lot of people are living by emotion and feeling rather than by decision. When we live by emotion we react to that which happens around us. When we live by decision we are living life as we choose it and respond as we choose. Living by decision requires discipline. In order to live as God would have us live we have to be willing to be disciplined by God. Someone who lives a disciplined life learns to say no to that which they don't need. They learn to do without that which they want. They even learn to live through suffering for the sake of the experience and the knowledge they gain.

Those who live by emotion tend to seek happiness, comfort, joy, peace, love, and many other feel good moods. Those who live by decision decide to be happy. Decide to live joyfully. Decide to live in peace. Decide to love.

It is impossible to do this on your own. By nature we are selfish. But we have to get to the point where we at the very least cry out to God to save us and lead our lives. From there it is a process of giving more and more of our lives to God until eventually all that we have and all that we are has been given to God. We no longer worry about the things in our lives that make us happy. We worry about serving God and living as God would have us live.

There are some rudimentary issues to work through to understand God's relationship with us before we can fully learn to live by decision. (We need to take care of our emotional response to God. Will God take care of us?)

Read Matthew 6:28-34.

²⁸ “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹ Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰ If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? ³¹ So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’³² For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. ³³ But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ³⁴ Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

This scripture talks about eating, drinking, and what we wear and that the pagan's worry about such things. The main emphasis verse is 33. When our entire existence is centered around serving God, He will provide us the resources necessary to accomplish His work. Our primary worry should not be our physical condition but rather if we are serving God.

Read Malachi 3:6-12

⁶ “I the LORD do not change. So you, the descendants of Jacob, are not destroyed. ⁷ Ever since the time of your ancestors you have turned away from my decrees and have not kept them. Return to me, and I will return to you,” says the LORD Almighty.

“But you ask, ‘How are we to return?’

⁸ “Will a mere mortal rob God? Yet you rob me.

“But you ask, ‘How are we robbing you?’

“In tithes and offerings. ⁹ You are under a curse—your whole nation—because you are robbing me. ¹⁰ Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this,” says the LORD Almighty, “and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it. ¹¹ I will prevent pests from devouring your crops, and the vines in your fields will not drop their fruit before it is ripe,” says the LORD Almighty. ¹² “Then all the nations will call you blessed, for yours will be a delightful land,” says the LORD Almighty.

Many worry if God will come through and provide us enough money to pay our bills. I have witnessed many of those same people keep their tithes just to make sure they are covered. They figure once they have extra then they will tithe. Somehow they never have extra. To me it is plain and simple. If you do not tithe you do not really believe that God exists and is who He says He is. Tithing is our way of showing God that we trust Him to take care of us. This isn't about the church. This is about you and God. If you do not tithe, God will not bless you. I will not guarantee that you won't suffer if you do tithe, but if while tithing you seek to honor and glorify God and serve Him in all your ways, then God will make sure that you have what you need to accomplish what God needs you to do. That is the catch. Are you willing to be where God wants you rather than where you want to be.

God might call you to serve a people or a culture where money has very little value. If God calls you to serve in Ethiopia your home might be a tent. Your food might be beans and rice. Your clothes might be donations. Is that acceptable? Is it that God is only blessing you if you are in a 3 or 4 bedroom house with a 3 car garage with 2 cars and a boat and the ability to eat out twice a week?

What if you are serving the people in a starving country and your family starves as well? Will you only love God and serve God if He meets your physical needs as you see them?

Read Matthew 6:19-24

¹⁹ “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. ²⁰ But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. ²¹ For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

²² “The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy,^[c] your whole body will be full of light. ²³ But if your eyes are unhealthy,^[d] your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!

²⁴ “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.

Do Not Worry

²⁵ “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?²⁶ Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷ Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life^[e]?

²⁸ “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹ Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰ If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? ³¹ So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’³² For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. ³³ But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ³⁴ Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

When our life is based on what we have or don't have then we will be disappointed even angry at our life. We will be cranky with other people. We will feel like life is unfair. We will feel like God doesn't like us.

The only way to true happiness, joy, peace, love, etc.... Is by giving every last part of who you are to God. You must give God control of every part of your life. You must be ready to accept any job that God determines is the job for you. (You have to ask God for the right job, of course.) You must be ready to accept where God has you live. You must be ready to accept what God provides in terms of clothes and food. You must be ready to accept with joy if what God determines is best for you is homelessness and starvation. You must view the sacrifice and the suffering as an honor and be grateful that God has determined that you are able to serve him in that circumstance.

If your happiness is based on this world in any way you will be disappointed. True peace and joy is centered on your ability to be where God wants you doing what God wants you to do. God will provide everything you need to do that.

Read 2 Corinthians 9:6-14

⁶ Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. ⁷ Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. ⁸ And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. ⁹ As it is written:

“They have freely scattered their gifts to the poor;
their righteousness endures forever.”^[a]

¹⁰ Now he who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will also supply and increase your store of seed and will enlarge the harvest of your righteousness. ¹¹ You will be enriched in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God.

¹² This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of the Lord’s people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God. ¹³ Because of the service by which you have proved yourselves, others will praise God for the obedience that accompanies your confession of the gospel of Christ, and for your generosity in sharing with them and with everyone else. ¹⁴ And in their prayers for you their hearts will go out to you, because of the surpassing grace God has given you. ¹⁵ Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!

God does reward us when we are faithful. He might not reward us in wealth, but He without a doubt rewards us in our relationship with Him and our ability to be at peace and joy in all things.

Next time you are feeling a little cranky and feel like God is picking on you, ask yourself if you are seeking what you want or what God wants. Ask if you are trusting God in all things including your money by tithing or if you are holding back, just in case God doesn't do what you want Him to.

May God bless you in all things that you require to serve Him.

Merry Christmas

2011-12-25T07:56:00.001-07:00

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. While a cliche to a bad novel it does describe this year. I suppose it explains living fully dependent on God. There is a thrill, an exhilaration from living on the edge of total loss only to see God provide just enough every time. There is also struggle as you learn to give up control of your life and learn to enjoy the moment regardless of the circumstances.

I lived many years being fearful of failure. It led to a life of mediocrity. Actually it wasn't living at all. I was the one failing. I was the one who wasn't good enough. I was the one who didn't have the will power to do things better. Then I gave God permission to change me and to direct my life. Sound like salvation? Sort of, we use that language, don't we? But how many saved Christians actually trust God with everything? If God told you to leave your life behind, would you? I mean everything, your spouse, your children, your family, your job. Everything. That is the question. I'm not saying He definitely will, but He could.

The bottom line is that you will never fully live until you give God control of every single thing in your life and are willing to lose everything to have Him.

I am also amazed at how few Christians tithe now, it is more than just keeping the lights on or paying the pastor. It is an act of sacrifice that says that you trust God to provide for your family even when you see no way it can happen. If you don't put yourself in that situation then you don't really believe in God. You believe in a lifestyle or a religion. Something that makes you feel like you are doing the right thing once in a while.

Are you in or are you out?

This has been a hard journey for my family and it is just starting. I gave up the safe job. We gave up our house. We left friends and family. We moved to a place we did not know without jobs or housing. This doesn't make us special. We simply obeyed even when we didn't want to. Although it hurt, we now have new friends, new jobs, and new housing. Our new friends have been generous in helping us move and providing food to help get us started.

My jobs are teaching me how to be a minister better than I would have ever learned in a pastorate where I got paid.

I can promise you pain. I can promise that you will wonder why you did it. I can promise that you will wonder if your family will survive. But I also promise that if you give absolutely everything to God that you will understand what it means to actually be alive and that you will know true joy.

May we celebrate the gift that God has given us this day by giving him all that we have.

Are you a rental, owner occupied, or no vacancy?

2011-12-18T22:18:00.001-07:00

This week we moved into our "new" house. I hate moving. The big things aren't that bad. It is all of the little boxes and single item things that just seem to appear out of nowhere. At any rate that event got me to thinking about today's topic.

In this metaphor we are like homes and Jesus is the person living there. The no vacancy one is easy. Your life is full and you have no room for Jesus. Moving on.

The next one is a question whether Jesus owns you or you just let him use you if He meets your terms. If you are a rental you let Jesus hang out when it is convenient for you. You have certain rules that Jesus has to work within in order for Jesus to have any part of your life.

If Jesus owns you then you have given Jesus the right to live within you with no restrictions.

We moved into a rental. The walls are in bad shape, the floor is not that great, the windows need replaced, and the backyard isn't that great. Since it is a rental we can live here, but we pretty much just have to put up with the junk. If on the other hand we had purchased the house we would be able to remodel the house however we wanted. Are you willing to let Jesus remodel you?

We are called to be servants of Christ. Actually the term is close to bond slave. What that means is that you sell yourself to your master. We are called to sell control of our lives to Jesus. We then agree to live in service to Christ. We are saved by grace and it is a free gift you can't earn. But there is a price for salvation. You. Salvation only works if you live completely controlled by God. If you don't then you will be living your way under your own ability and you can't live in God's spirit if you aren't following Him.

Living in God's spirit means trusting God with everything we have. Do you tithe? No? Why not? Tithing isn't just about paying for expenses at church. It is giving in such a way that the only way you will survive is if God exists and provides for you. You might lose a house, or car, or job, but God will provide everything you and your family needs to reach out to others in relationship and to spread the Good News. Don't make enough? Not sure about your job or the economy? Do you do a lot of nice things for the church and others?

Tithing and giving to God is a sign of trust in God. If you don't do it then quite frankly you don't believe God to be who He says He is. You don't trust that God will put you where He wants you and will provide you the resources you need to complete the task. You are rented. You only let God work in your life if you are comfortable with the potential results.

The thing is that you are really only alive when God has complete control. Isn't it time you became owner occupied?

Update on our latest blessings

2011-12-11T08:07:00.001-07:00

This past week we signed a lease on a townhouse. We will move in later this week. This decision was made in a way that was very different then when we moved into our last house.

This time we were unsure about it. Financially, we are uncomfortable making the move. If we were only relying on our own abilities to pay for the house, we wouldn't do it. I had researched the rental market quite a bit. Essentially we couldn't afford anything that fit our family. Anything close to our price range would have required us to share 1 or 2 bedrooms. I found myself wondering if we were supposed to make that sacrifice. How could I be confident that God would provide housing that would make my family comfortable? He doesn't guarantee physical comfort, rather He guarantees that we will be attacked for serving in His name, and that He will always be there for us relationally.

As we began narrowing down our choices I had to stop looking at housing in terms of my family and start looking at it terms of ministry.

If we didn't move from where we are currently staying it would have a negative impact on our ability as a staff to minister to our church. God has called us to teach his people here how to grow in loving relationships and one of the best ways to do that is to have people over. Neither family can invite others over very easily when we live together. It reduces us down to one entity rather than two working for a common purpose.

If we were to stay it would be a huge financial benefit. We could get caught up on some of our bills and save some money. It was clear that for the sake of ministry we had to move.

Next we had to figure out which house was the one God wanted us to use for ministry. The one bedroom and two bedroom homes kept coming back as non-functional because although we could survive there, how we used the house would have made it difficult to invite people over. Having someone sleep in the dining room makes it harder to have people over for dinner. That isn't to say that God wont call you to live in such a situation because your mission may not involve the house, but for us the house was to serve as an extension of the church.

The one home kept showing itself as I searched. It didn't just fall in our lap. I had to be persistent with the management company to get a response, but the other houses I kept calling on kept disappearing whereas this one remained available.

This house is no gem. It has old carpet and tile. The cabinets are cheap and wore out. The walls are dirty. The back yard is worthless as it is small and has a severe slope down. The kid's bedrooms are very small. But it does have a full basement for storage and we might be able to create a hangout space for the kids. It wont be glamorous but it will serve God's purpose.

God has called us to have a presence in the neighborhood. God has called us to invite and build relationships with coworkers and friends of our children. God has called us to invite members of our church and encourage them to follow our example in terms of building relationships. We may have to fix noodles every night in order to feed our guests, but we expect that God will provide the resources we need to serve Him.

One of our biggest worries was being able to afford the rent and utilities. This month I miss two weeks of work due to Christmas break and another week for spring break. I will also need a summer job to cover the rent. My pay has to cover housing because my wife's is just enough to cover everything else. My IRA at my former job had some money in it and I was able to close that account to have money in reserve to help cover our deposit and other moving related expenses. (Blessing). Shortly after we signed the lease I also was made aware of the opportunity to fill in for driving the ski bus for where we live and then work at the ski lodge once I am up there.. I have 2 Saturdays already lined up. This will cover 1 week of Christmas break. (Blessing). I am scheduled to ride the longest route in our school district next week. This will bring in more money than normal and should cover the other week of Christmas break. Now I just need 2 more day on the Ski bus and I can cover spring break! (Blessing).

Our budget doesn't really cover utilities very well or feeding our guests, but we trust that God will provide. Our kids have insurance through the state and get free lunches. We might be able to get food stamps which would help us cover other expense. I'm not thrilled about that option but I guess I will humble myself and accept God's help in what ever form he chooses. We still need a dining table and I trust that God will help us find one that fits the ministry.

The future doesn't look to be easy, but it will be where God wants us and that is all that we can ask for. We continue to boldly step out in faith without knowing exactly how God will answer. It is scary at times, but always worth it.

Please do not mistake my descriptions as a complaint. God is providing exactly what we need to be where and who He wants us to be. My goal I have in writing this blog is to truthfully describe our journey. I could withhold our struggles and put on a brave front so that those who read this think that following God a certain way is easy, but that wouldn't be true. This entire process has been hard and continues to be hard. But we have a choice. We can have an easier life and disobey God and just simply exist, or we can risk everything we have on earth just for the chance to live exactly like God wants us to live. It is hard but it is worth every minute.

Overcoming Satan

2011-12-01T11:23:00.000-07:00

This past week I preached on Hope. However I had probably a rather depressing view on hope. At least the presentation probably made it seem that way. The sermon in a nut shell was that everything that we know or care about will fail us or fall away except for Jesus. If we place our hope in anything other than Jesus than we will lose hope. I discussed losing homes, cars, and loved ones. I discussed being homeless and without food. How we aren't guaranteed anything that makes us comfortable, but we are guaranteed to be persecuted for following Christ. In Mark 13:1-2 (NIV) we read "As Jesus was leaving the temple, one of his disciples said to him, 'Look, Teacher! What massive stones! What magnificent buildings!' 'Do you see all these great buildings?' replied Jesus. 'Not one stone here will be left on another; every one will be thrown down.'" In Mark 13:9-13 (NIV) "You must be on your guard. You will be handed over to the local councils and flogged in the synagogues. On account of me you will stand before governors and kings as witnesses to them. And the gospel must first be preached to all nations. Whenever you are arrested and brought to trial, do not worry beforehand about what to say. Just say whatever is given you at the time, for it is not you speaking, but the Holy Spirit. Brother will betray brother to death and a father his child. Children will rebel against their parents and have them put to death. Everyone will hate you because of me, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved."

We often brush off scripture like this because we have "freedom" in the USA. There are countries where this scripture is very real and prophetic. It is real in our country as well, it just looks different. Instead of being beaten to death, or burned, or shot, or hung, we are robbed of a loving relationship with our creator and our family because of apathy and the small quiet voice of Satan. We don't live 100% for God. We do just enough that we should earn our way to heaven. This is living by the law. If I don't do certain things and if I go to church often enough then I should be ok. It doesn't work that way. We mistakenly say that the gift of salvation is free. That there is nothing we can do to earn it. This is partly true. We can't earn the gift. But in order to use the gift effectively we have to follow the instructions properly. The gift of salvation only works correctly if you let Jesus have complete control of your life. Perhaps you will make it to heaven if you don't let Him have everything but....you will have to face God knowing that you did not live your life devoted to telling others about Him but rather focused on yourself.

The past week and this week have been difficult. The little voice of doubt or fear that Satan usually uses was ringing in my ears. As I prepared for the sermon, I had difficulty focusing. Just about every real temptation I might have was thrown in front of me to distract me or take energy away from me so that I couldn't work on my sermon. I kept trying to prepare a sermon based on hope and scriptures that would give us hope and warm feelings. But I kept getting drawn back into preaching that this world is hopeless. Our hopes and our dreams shouldn't lie with what this world can provide us, but with what we have in Jesus. I kept trying to write out my sermon so that I could edit and adjust the length accordingly, but I was repeatedly drawn back to focusing on the images I was using. The images were meant to tell the story.

I prayed and struggled through the whole process. With each image and video I prayed for guidance and direction. I begged God to use me effectively and to not allow my faults and inability to stand in the way of the church hearing his word that morning. I never did get to do a practice run through. I was still updating and making changes Sunday morning after having spent most of the night in prayer. I ended up preaching for almost 1 hour and the service ran almost 2 hours. I suppose time shouldn't matter. It doesn't in many cultures, but in ours if you take longer than expected then people stop coming back and you lose the opportunity to reach them.

All Sunday morning I prayed for wisdom. All Monday I prayed for forgiveness for having messed up so badly. The voice was ringing in my head. The church hadn't been decorated for Christmas yet. Why didn't I make a better effort to contact someone to get the decorating done during the week. I called and left a message, but I felt I should have done more. The snow had blown across the sidewalks and although I spent over an hour shoveling on Saturday afternoon, I felt that I should have started Saturday morning. I should have paid more attention to the music and I should have been more involved in the selection process. I should have used less images. I shouldn't have done the videos. I shouldn't have mixed two metaphors. I shouldn't have stood a certain way.

Then it moved on from there. My paychecks from driving bus aren't going to be as large as I had hoped. Instead of being able to afford a cheap 3 bedroom townhouse or apartment we may have to find a way to make a 2 bedroom work. Then I hear the voice tell me how unfair that is to my family. That it is more than I should ask of my children and my wife. Then the voice comes back and starts making me feel guilty for thinking that we should have better. Why should we deserve better? There are some who are homeless. Shouldn't our family be appreciative to have housing even if it meant that we all slept in the same bedroom? I started thinking of the single mother our church has been helping and of the apartment she just moved into and how she is sharing a bedroom with her daughter. Why should I have better?

Our small group on Tuesday night was talking about how we would like to be passionate about Jesus. Are we would be willing to do anything Jesus asks? I didn't want to say anything, because I feel like I have said it too much. How can what I am doing be meaningful and humble in nature if I keep telling people what I have done as if it is something special. But I sometimes feel like not everyone understands what my family did. It feels as if people question how they could give up everything to follow Jesus. How would that work? How could you trust God that much? My family did it. I gave up my job without knowing where I would work or where we would live. We went 13 weeks without knowing what was going to happen. We lived completely in faith. Then we gave up our house and our dog and moved to a town where we hardly knew anyone and didn't have a place to live or any income. We lived in faith that Jesus would provide and He has. We do currently live with the pastor and his family and it is a hardship on my family and his family. We do have jobs that don't provide quite enough income to provide us a comfortable home or the ability to really do much of anything other than work and church. My family is in the midst of living totally on faith not knowing what God has planned for our future. Everything we do is now based on whether or not we think God wants us to have it.

Have you ever asked if you were supposed to live in your house? Is that the neighborhood where God wants you to be a minister? Are you moving to a house because you like the house or because it will be a launching pad for reaching the community in Jesus name? Are you working where you work because you like the work and the money or are you there because God placed you there to build relationships with co-workers and customers and to be a witness in Jesus name? Are your children involved in activities because it makes them happy and might make their future lives better or are they in activities because of the opportunities it gives you and your children to develop new relationships and tell others about God?

If you kind of follow Jesus, Satan will harass you a little, but he isn't that worried about you. After all your lukewarm approach to quietly and cautiously telling others that you go to church will have little to no impact on others. If anything you help his cause by admitting that you are a Christian and then behaving in a way that most agree is not like Christ.

If you follow Jesus 100% where your entire existence depends on Jesus coming through for you then Satan will be after you and your family with a vengeance. I mean live in such a way that if God doesn't come through on what you believe He has asked you to do you will look like a complete idiot and you will lose everything including your family. If you do that not only will you have the pressure of being faithful and trusting God, but you will have the voice of Satan attacking you and your family in all of the areas where you are weakest. You may even fail from time to time and need to be forgiven and you may need to ask others to forgive you. You might even lose your family because they also have to chose to be 100% in. Your children may decide the suffering isn't worth it and they won't have faith or believe like you think they should. Your wife might decide it isn't worth it. Do you follow God 100% regardless of the cost or do you tell God that the cost is too great and try and save your family? (This isn't meant to say that you ignore your family. God expects us to learn how to be good parents and live in healthy relationships. It just means that you have to do what is right as a parent or spouse or even as a kid even it means the rest of your family doesn't go for it. But the right thing includes being a part of the family.)

I have decided that I have to accept the suffering that comes with following 100%. I have to accept that my family will suffer from that decision and that they may or may not follow my lead. But I have to be their example and I would not want my family to do anything less than follow God 100%. How can I expect them to do that if I don't do it myself.

Earlier this week the single mother our church has been helping came into the church during the week. She was very upset. Luckily the pastor's wife was there and we both sat down to talk with this mother. She was distraught and I think mostly just needed some emotional support. Then it was as if God was the one whispering to me. The sermon was for her. The images were for her. The video was for her. Everything you said and everything you did was for her. You laid a foundation of prayer for your message and you earnestly sought to be my messenger. You did your best to let me speak through you and I did. This woman has lost all those things that I presented and she needed to hear, even if it was in kind of a depressing way, that Jesus was her only hope. She is in a depressed frame of mind. She is at the end of the line and has no where else to go. The only option she has left is to let God have everything she is and has.

There may be others in our church who weren't happy about the length. There may be some who will remember that I seemed distracted or unprepared. Others will simply think I must not know what I am doing to have to depend so much on images or video. I myself still question my effectiveness. But I will take all of that if just one person hear the voice of God in such a way that it actually reached them so that they will respond.

So what is my greatest weapon against Satan? I first have to understand that the lies, fear, and negativity comes from Satan. Next I have to trust that even though I may have to struggle or live where it is not comfortable that Jesus only wants the best for me and that everything He gives me is meant to help me be who I am supposed to be and that is also true for my family. Then I do things like this. I reflect on my life and what God has done for me and I begin to see things clearly again.

Joy Guaranteed

2011-11-19T08:21:00.001-07:00

I guarantee that you can have joy in your life everyday.

If I can make such bold claims, couldn't I sell my knowledge and become rich?

Sadly the cost to obtain this joy is too great for too many bare.

First off, there is only one person you can buy this from and it is very expensive. This person will require you to give them everything you own. You must give him your home, your cars, your clothes, your phone. Everything. You must give him your spouse and your children if you have them. You must become a slave to this person. You must agree to serve this person the rest of your life. You must give up your free will.

As a slave to this person you will suffer greatly. You will be required to not do many of the things you used to enjoy. You will be asked to freely serve everyone you know as their servant in your masters name.

Every dime you make will be your masters. Every decision you will make will be couched in whether your master approves.

You will be selling your soul to this person. You will be giving up everything. You must also tell your master every secret you ever had. You must tell him about everything you have ever done wrong.

You will be judged by your master for your wrongs and you will be sentenced to death. You must agree to stand ready to serve your punishment of death. Then your master will step up in your place and take your punishment for you. Your master will absolve you of your wrong doings and free you from death by serving your sentence for you.

It is at that moment that you will realize that your master is your creator. You will learn that by giving Him everything you have gained everything. You will learn that by serving Him you are disciplined and better able to receive the blessings your master has for you.

Yes, your master is Jesus. I have often told children that the gift of salvation is free. But it isn't. There is nothing you can do to earn it. But the cost is high. The cost of salvation, of a true relationship with Jesus is your life. When you give Jesus everything you have; every part of your life and not just most of it, then you have life.

In Luke 8, Jesus tells a story about the farmer spreading seeds on different ground and how that seed grows or doesn't grow on that ground. In this case we are called to be good soil so that the seed or truth can grow. But in order to be good soil you have to get rid of the thorns and the rocks. You have to work the soil and get it ready. We have to let God discipline us so that we can be that soil.

How do you have joy guaranteed?

Give everything you have and are to God. Accept Jesus gift of salvation. Live everyday for God. When your whole focus is on serving your master then you will find joy in everything you do and are. You will have joy because you will be who you were meant to be.

Not joyful? What haven't you given your master? In what area are you more concerned with yourself than others? Joy is a choice. A choice to serve and bless others in the name of your master, Jesus.

When loved ones suffer

2011-11-12T08:33:00.001-07:00

For the first time since I started this blog I skipped a week. I just couldn't decide what I wanted to write about. I did write something about being careful to not base our belief in God on anything other than God himself. It seems that at times belief in God can be based on various religious practices or people. If it is found that those people or practices are less than 100% correct, faith in God can be shaken. I couldn't quite get the message to work without straying into areas that cause different groups of believers to argue, so I didn't write it.

This week I struggled with watching my family suffer. The best I can tell, at least it is my perception, their suffering is a result of my following God's call to leave what was known in Idaho and seek the unknown in Wyoming. It required faith and total dependence on God. It still does. Living totally dependent on God and within His will is a lot of hard work and is often uncomfortable.

I can handle suffering as a result of being disciplined by God so that I can be the messenger He has called me to be. I am certainly being made aware of just how much I don't know. But it is different when I see my family suffering. I want to fix it.

My wife is having to transition from being with her children 24 hours a day to seeing them just in the evening. She is having to rely on me to shuttle the kids to their various activities, to fix dinner, to shop, and numerous other things. It is requiring a change in her identity; in what her purpose is. Plus she has to put up with me not doing things the way she wants them done. Right now my wife is working through some things with God. I don't even know what those things are, but I do try and guess because that's who I am. I can't fix what she has going on. I have thought through various solutions but they all require me to disobey God and go against what He has called me to do. In my mind and in my heart that briefly pits my love for my wife against my love for God.

God wins because when I take time to look at the situation I am reminded that God loves my wife and is helping her work through things that will improve her life if she follows God. The same goes for my children. They experience things in school that they have never experienced before. Sometimes it causes them pain.

I was having a discussion with my daughter about trust and how as parents we often have a hard time letting our children be in situations were they can be hurt. She looked at me and said that we would have to lock her in the house and not let her live because everything has the potential to hurt you. At least that is what I think she said. But it did make me think. If we were to really try and protect our loved ones from being hurt we wouldn't let them do anything. By keeping them locked up in the house we also hurt them by not letting them be who God wants them to be. If we try and protect our loved ones from suffering under God's discipline then you have the same result. On a personal level, if we lock our hearts away to try and keep from getting hurt then we hurt ourselves because we aren't being who God wants us to be.

Through suffering comes joy. If you try and avoid suffering all you will do is suffer.

I am starting to realize just how many walls I put up to try and protect myself from the abuse of others. It makes it extremely difficult for me to have conversation or relationship with others I don't know. The truth is that I don't really want to know them or talk to them. My instinct tells me to avoid eye contact, to just keep my mouth shut, and to move away from the crowd. Crowds are dangerous because those who want to hurt you can come from anywhere. I usually avoid events with crowds because it drives my defensive devices into overdrive. My instinct is to just go be by myself because being lonely is safer than being embarrassed or physically hurt.

God did not call us to be alone. God has called us to be in relationship with Him and all that He has created. I have to force myself to behave in a manner that is contrary to what is comfortable for me just so that I can live in relationship with my family and close friends. Actually, I don't force very well. It is through the power of the Holy Spirit that I am able to do anything at all. Now as a pastor I recognize that most of the ministry is not about getting things done. It isn't about schedules, or committees, or about the message that Sunday. It is about living in relationship with those who are a part of that church body. Sometimes, I have to try and develop conversations to develop relationships when I would rather go hide in a corner. Sometimes I fail. I give in to what feels comfortable even though I know I will experience greater joy when I overcome those feelings, because each time I give in there is a spirit of defeat.

I also know that I don't have the ability to do it on my own. I can only succeed with the power of the Holy Spirit guiding me. So what do I do about my loved ones suffering? I make sure that they know that they can't make it without God, that they must give complete control of their lives to God because anything they hold back will cause them to grieve and that suffering for God because He is teaching us something leads to a better life, but if we avoid suffering for God then we will suffer the rest of eternity.

Old Church vs New Church or both?

2011-10-30T15:59:00.002-06:00

How are we to do church?

I think that first we need to understand what church is and what the purpose of the church is and the worship service. Church is not a place it is a group of people with a common mission. Worship is not a time that we sacrifice what we want to do in order to earn our way into heaven, it is a constant attitude and practice towards God. Worship is a every second of the day event.

If the church is people and worship is something that happens every second of the day then how do those people go about worshiping and fulfilling their mission to tell others about Jesus?

Some believe the answer lies in our past with traditional worship services and big programs. Their belief is based on a feeling that the early part of the 20th century was more Holy and pure than it is now.

Others believe that there must be a new church that looks different and acts different. They believe that everything should be thrown out and recreated.

While some believe that we need to go back even farther in time and recreate the church in Acts as much as possible.

My position is that there is some truth to all views. History and tradition does have a place in our community of believers and should have some influence on our practices and behaviors. It is the connection between current believers and our ancestors. It is just like the stories of the old testament that were passed down from generation to generation thus linking Adam, Noah, Moses, Abraham, David, and others to Jesus and to us. This link must not be broken lest we minimize the importance and validity of the faith of those who came before us. At the same time we can't ignore what is happening around us. The church must be relevant in the culture in which it exists. This does not mean that the culture should influence what we know to be true, but that our message and our interaction with that culture must be such that it will be accepted.

A minister in Africa presents the Gospel in a different manner than a minister in South America. A minister in 2011 must present the Gospel in a way that is different than a minister did in 1930. All of the ministers present the message of Jesus truthfully and accurately but the medium might change and the location might change.

I believe that each church should figure out what culture they exist in and then seek to develop healthy relationships between those in the church and those in the community. Breaking of bread may be imperative in the success of the church. The church should be encouraged to figure out how to meet with those not in the church for lunch or coffee on a regular basis. I would even go so far as to encourage a fund in church that can be used for this purpose for not just the pastors but for everyone in the church.

The church will reach new people by investing in relationships. It is no longer enough to tell people the Bible says it. We must be the example through our lives. By the way, the church that exists to make us feel good will not succeed. The church that will be used by God is the church that is filled with people willing to sacrifice everything they have just for the opportunity to serve God. You must be more interested in the benefit of others over yourself.

Should we expect to suffer?

2011-10-22T08:40:00.001-06:00

Romans 8:17 Now if we are children,then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ,if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.

Do we as Christians expect life to be easy? Is God supposed to protect us from all pain?

Didn't Noah suffer emotionally when he lost everyone he knew except for his family?

Didn't David suffer when he lost his son as punishment for his actions?

Didn't Joseph suffer even though he was a good man?

Didn't Moses suffer? Paul? Peter? Jesus?

Why is it that when we suffer we act like children and get mad at God? Should we not praise God instead? In the midst of our suffering when God sustains us is when God reveals his power and glory to us.

In our weakness we see God's power because we get out of the way.

Want to see the glory and the power of almighty God? Pray that he will honor you with suffering.

What would Jesus do

2011-10-15T06:48:00.001-06:00

This movement seems to pop up from time to time. Most recently as WWJD bracelets for teens. This main concept came from "In His Steps" which is a public domain book. You can download it for free from the Android market and probably the other online book sources as well.

The main premise behind the book is that a pastor and many of his members agree to ask "What would Jesus do?" Before making decisions. It leads to some very difficult choices with huge implications. Businessmen risk everything just because a simple decision has to be made a different way.

The question I ask you is this. "Are you willing to risk everything you have to follow Jesus and behave as Jesus would?" When you have a decision to make, stop and seek God's counsel. Do what you believe Jesus would do in that situation no matter what the risk is to you.

Do this and you will discover what it means to actually live.

Should sinners be allowed in church?

2011-10-08T07:19:00.001-06:00

I must warn you that some of of you might feel uncomfortable with this topic. It is meant to make you think a little bit.

What do we think about when we mention church? Singing to God. Preaching about God. Classes about God. What else does the church do? Many would probably say that we are meant to reach those who have not accepted Jesus as their Savior.

Let's take a deeper look at that. Reaching those who have not accepted Jesus means they would have sin in their lives or they are doing things that they shouldn't. What is the process here? Do we work on them and get them saved and then bring them to church? Do we invite them even though they aren't saved yet and might do and say things that are wrong? What if they swore in church? What if someone sees them coming to our church and then hears them talking about the bad things they do? Won't they think that our church is doing something wrong and won't it hurt our witness?

It seems to me that Jesus was not worried about His image or what other people thought. His focus was on people and their salvation. He was willing to be uncomfortable and die so that they might live. What are we willing to do?

So should a thief be allowed to attend our church? Should a murderer be allowed to attend our church? Should a child abuser? How about a gay person? Is the requirement that they admit that they were wrong and want to change? What do we do with the murder who says he doesn't think it is wrong? In fact he is pretty sure the Bible allows for it. What about the person who looks at pornography and says they don't see a reason to stop?

If a sinner is in our church and doesn't see their behavior as sin do we cast them out?

There are some Biblical mandates for keeping the church clean and what to do with church members who are actively sinning. It would seem to me that it is situational. Who is this person? What is their history with the church? How much do they know about God? What is their attitude? Is there a spirit of repentance?

I believe that in many cases Jesus would extend grace to the sinner. In some circumstances I do believe that Jesus would remove someone from the church. It wouldn't be because someone embarrasses us or makes us uncomfortable. It would be because they have the full knowledge of who Jesus is and have willingly and purposefully rejected Jesus.

My challenge to you is to think about what it would mean to have people who behave differently than you, and believe differently than you in your church. Can you accept them and do your best to help them learn more about Jesus? Is there a certain type of sinner that is acceptable but one that isn't? Is the sinner who hides their sin welcomed but the one whose sin is visible is not? What should the church do if they found out you had sin in your life that you were struggling with?

Be careful who you disparage someone or suggest that they are less than a beautiful creation of God. God just might ask you to be their example and that person may have heard or know what you said. Don't destroy your witness because someone's choices disgust you. I'm not asking you to approve of their choices, but your behavior must exhibit a loving acceptance of the person. Anything less and you will be of no service to God in reaching that person.

So should sinners be allowed in church? I hope so. Otherwise it would be a very small church.

To live you must die

2011-10-01T08:33:00.001-06:00

25 Jesus said to her,“I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live,even though they die; 26 and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?”

Sometimes we quickly pass over things like this. God is full of contrasts. We only live in death. As a christian that might make sense, but probably not to other people.

How is it that we live when we die? As a christian I can easily say that means that after we die we go to heaven. Pretty simple. Not so fast. The principle here is that we truly live in Christ when we give him complete control of our lives. Giving up control of everything in your life is like dying. Are you willing to give up your house? Are you willing to give up everything you own to serve God? Yes? Ok, now are you willing to give up all sources of income and serve God? A little harder? Are you willing to leave your loved ones to serve God? I'm not talking about your parents. I'm talking about your spouse and children. If God called you to leave them behind, would you?

Dying to Christ is giving up control of everything. It is letting God have your family, your job, your life. We often think we have given God control because we want him to be in control. But giving God control requires us to step out into a place where we can only survive physically, mentally, and emotionally with God's help. I'm not talking about surviving a difficult time. I am talking about potentially losing everything if God doesn't come through for you. You have only died to Christ if by following Christ you could perhaps lose everything you own or care about.

I'm not saying He will cause that to happen, but I'm not saying He won't. That's just it. There is a chance you could lose everything and Jesus must be worth more than anything else in your life including your family.

Once you take that step you are in for a wild journey. God is finally able to show you more of His power and grace. When you live completely dependent upon God then every day is a blessing. Every meal is a blessing. Every breath you take is a blessing. Your soul cries out to glorify and praise God and it takes everything you have to not run up and down the streets shouting praises to God. Actually maybe we should be doing that.

If you have not experienced what I am talking about I invite you to start the process. It doesn't usually happen overnight. You must first start asking for it. You must give God permission to discipline you and prepare you to give Him everything. God will then start placing challenges in your life to test you. Each time it gets a little harder. That's right; you must ask God to make your life harder so that you can learn to trust Him. As you learn to trust God through each challenge God will create situations that begin to expose areas in your life where you haven't given God control. Beware. The last area of control you keep is the hardest to give up and you will literally feel as if you are dying as you release it.

Once you have finally given up all control and are living only by the grace of God, your entire world will change. Your house, your car, and all your other possessions become tools for serving God. You will find that you have lost your emotional attachment to them. If they help you serve God you find ways to use them. If they hinder, you get rid of them. You might even find yourself giving away your most prized possession for free because it helps someone else. The many fears you have about your family go away. The time you spend away from them becomes more purposeful in your service to God and your time with your family becomes more purposeful and meaningful because you understand what it means to lose them; because you have. You will start living and working in such a way that you actually make your family more Important then you had before.

When you serve God completely that doesn't mean you have to quit your job to become a pastor. What it means is that you work where you work to serve God not to make money. You go to work and you do your job well to glorify God and to bless those you work with and you try to find ways to develop relationships with your coworkers. You don't do it so you have an opportunity to tell them have to be saved or else. You do it to love them and support them and be a living example of Jesus. You will seek opportunities to share the good news about Jesus but it will be within a loving and caring relationship built on trust and respect. You will have earned their permission to share.

Are you up for it?

If you are committing to it share a comment here or send me an email. God is moving and His power and glory is transforming lives. You can be a part of it but you have to die first.

Do you trust God with your life?

2011-09-24T10:57:00.001-06:00

Earlier this year I told my employer that God had given me permission to enter full time ministry. A short time later that employer told me that God had told him to give me 13 weeks of employment so that I would be forced to look for a church position. The church where I had been serving ended up not being an option. The one church that God wanted me to serve would not be able to pay me. The situation I was faced with was giving up our house and moving to another town with no known source of income. That required a lot of trust.

Now we live in the new town and I am the associate pastor. We live with the pastor and his family and I drive school bus part time. My wife is looking for a job. There are still things that aren't answered. If my wife can't find a job then we will have to give our motorhome back to the bank and reduce our expenses to under $800 a month.

Have you encountered a situation where you were too afraid that God wouldn't keep his promise to trust Him?

I have been able to trust God because of our relationship. My God is not something I try and do just enough to earn a pass to Heaven. My God is my creator who created me to live in close relationship with Him. We share life together. We suffer together. We experience joy together.

Tomorrow I have the privilege to preach in our church. My message will be on the fact that we need to trust God with everything we have. We claim we believe in God but then we don't trust God to fulfill his promises to us. We all have experiences where we think God has failed us. This leads us to fear God enough to try and earn our way to Heaven but we don't trust Him to lead our lives now.

I encourage you to read Proverbs 3:5-6. We don't always have to understand what God is doing to trust Him. But when we do trust God in everything we do, He will show us what direction to go.

This journey I have been on has not made sense at the time it was happening, but looking back it has been amazing to see God at work. There are times when we discipline our children and they don't understand or like what we are doing. The same is true when God disciplines us. Sometimes we simply whine and complain and sometimes tell God He can't have control of our lives because the last time hurt too much.

It seems to me that if we claim to believe in God that we should also believe what God tells us and that we should obey God. Why is it that people are willing to live as if they believe God but refuse to let Him in?

Inspect your life and ask God to expose any areas where you may not have given God control. True joy and life happens when God has complete control of your life.

Your existence changes the future of the world.

2011-09-17T06:38:00.001-06:00

There is a movie called the Butterfly Effect. I haven't seen it, but from what I know the main thought behind the movie is that the movement or the existence or lack of existence of one butterfly changes the whole world. When a butterfly moves its wings it moves the air around it. That air impacts the matter it comes in contact with and begins a chain of events that reaches around the world.
Let's talk about how we impact the world. Each breath I take impacts the world. I inhale oxygen and other various elements and when I exhale the air has changed its composition. Those in near proximity breathe in some of that air that I have exhaled. If I exhale a virus into the air I can cause others to become sick. Yes, it is kind of gross but second by second we breath air that has been inside another person.

Simply by existing and breathing I am changing the world.

Let's take it to the next step. Imagine that I am sitting in a restaurant. I have had a bad day. I am grumpy. When the waitress comes to serve me I am rude to her. Later I leave. The result could be that the waitress just writes me off as a jerk and there isn't much of an impact on either of our lives. But it could be that this waitress was told that I am a Christian and the waitress has been trying to figure out who God is. The result of my being rude to her causes her to feel that Christians are no better than anyone else and she figures there is no reason to try figuring it out. As a result this woman never attends church or develops a relationship with anyone who is a Christian. She never tells her kids anything about God except that He probably doesn't exist and that Christians are a bunch of freaks. Her children never attend church and grow up thinking Christians are weird and develop a negative attitude towards them. Their children in turn teach their children the same thing and so on down the road. Eventually we go from having one woman put off by Christians because of one event to hundreds if not thousands of people who don't like Christians or the God they represent.

One action can impact the future positively or negatively in a big way. Now what if instead of being rude I displayed grace and humility? What if instead I appeared open and friendly to the waitress? Perhaps a conversation could be had and a door opened that wasn't there before. Every day we make small decisions and those decisions impact those around us. The small unintended decision can negatively impact generations of people. It is for that reason why every action should glorify God. We can't do that on our own. We must start each day relying on God to provide us the strength and ability to be a positive impact on our world.

We don't have to be Billy Graham to impact hundreds of thousands of people. All we have to do is be who God intended us to be and say yes to God. God takes care of the rest of it. You just be some guy who fixes things. Maybe your speech is not all that elegant. But God can use you right where you are and every action you take prepares those around you to hear God.

It is for that reason that we start each day seeking God's protection over our life and each day giving our life and all that we do to God. Seek each day to bless those you impact and watch what a difference it will make in the world.

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Rules or relationship; is Heaven the goal or is God the goal?

2011-09-10T08:42:00.001-06:00

Early on in history we see where God had a one on one relationship with His people. He had intimate and powerful discussions with Adam & Eve, Noah, Abraham, Moses, Joseph, and so on. Over time we find that the Jewish nation has moved from an intimate relationship to one based on rules and authority structures. The people wanted a King to set rules. They had to have priests talk to God for them. Eventually we find that God is hidden in a temple and accessible by only a few. Another layer is added and your success as a follower of Jehovah was based on your ability to follow the rules. The truth is that they no longer worshiped God. They worshiped the rules. The rules became their God.

God sent Jesus to us and Jesus showed them that God desires an intimate relationship. He doesn't want us to struggle and try to follow a bunch of rules and earn our salvation. He wants us to cry out to Him and accept Him into our lives and live in a loving relationship.

In many churches today we once again see where the rules are being worshiped rather than God. It isn't intentional. But wherever man has not given up full control of their lives to God, they are trying to earn salvation and remain in control of their destiny. When you have control of your life you are not able to fully worship or understand God. You attempt to please God by following rules. You memorize them. You beg for forgiveness when you break one and get your heaven pass back. Some even may have enough self control that they are able to not break the rules they think you have to follow to get to Heaven.

God does not ask us to follow rules. He asks us to give everything we have to Him. Does that mean we can do what we want? Believing that you can have God in control of your life and behave as you wish is ignorance. Some seem to think that asking Jesus into your heart is a magic potion that forces God to let you into Heaven. Since they have a free pass they can live as they wish.

What I mean in terms of following rules versus God is that when God is in control of your life you will live a certain way because you love God and desire to live that way. Rules are something you follow to get something in return. Someone who attempts to follow rules to obey God still maintains control of their life and they are simply trying to manipulate God.

Does that mean we can ignore our fellow Christians or our churches? No. That would be a failure to understand our Biblical mandate to live in relationship with one another. If your church has rules that hinder the Holy Spirit from working then you might be called to work with your church to discover what God has called that church to do. Your role wouldn't be to bring harm or disruption to that church, less you harm innocent people seeking God.

How you follow God either by rules or by an intimate loving relationship determines how you approach those who don't believe. If you still control your life, you will approach others out of sense of duty or by following another rule. You will explain things in terms of what you have to do to get your Heaven pass and what you can't do. With a heavy focus on what you can't do. However, if you have given God complete control then your approach will be one based on relationship and actually caring about that person. Your explanation of who God is will be based on their personal situation and will be lead by the Holy Spirit who will also have been working on that person. If you simply follow the rules you will be less likely to interact with those who don't follow God because their behavior will make it harder for you to not mess up. You will isolate yourself from those who are not Christians. It takes someone operating under the full protection of the Holy Spirit to passionately engage in real and meaningful relationships with those who don't believe or trust God. Your purpose isn't to convert someone so you can check off another item on your list. It is to be an ambassador for God. That can only be done through a real and meaningful relationship.

If you struggle to not sin you must first determine if you are trying to follow rules under your own power. You can't do it without God. He doesn't want us to struggle trying to meet a set of rules. God wants us to depend on Him and give Him the praise and glory for everything that happens in our lives. He doesn't promise that everything will be easy if we give Him everything. But He does promise to give us what we need to be who He wants us to be if we seek what He wants us to have.

(What do I mean by Heaven pass?)

Someone living by the rules has an objective or a goal. That is heaven. They simply want to do enough to get their reward in heaven. Someone who loves God and gives him everything sees that relationship as the reward. Heaven is not the goal. God is the goal and we can have that right now. Many people see heaven as the goal and so they think that as long as they do or say the right things just before they die that they will get their reward. This view also impacts how we tell others about God or our urgency to do so. If your view is that we just want to get to heaven and a simple prayer is the key then you will do your best to get people to say that prayer before they die. My view is that living with God in a relationship where he has full control is the goal and I can have that now and so can others. The reward can be had right now. That creates a much bigger urgency because every minute a person spends out of relationship with God is a minute that they aren't experiencing their reward.

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Religion or relationship

2011-09-03T07:49:00.001-06:00

We find many relationships between man and God early in the old testament but overtime we find a people who drifted from a personal relationship to one based on rules. The God of the Israelites changed from being the God they talked to and individually worshipped to a God that commanded them to not do or to do certain things. They developed a religion. If you obeyed all 600 and some rules then you would make it to heaven. God would judge your performance and if you did a good job of following the rules you would make it in. Your fellow Jew would often help point out the areas where you needed improvement, because they were concerned about you.

Jesus came onto the scene and pretty much told them that it wasn't about the rules. God wanted to know them personally. He came down in human form so that we could better relate to Him on an individual level. Jesus turned religion upside down. You weren't ok just following rules. In fact you would fail miserably trying because that meant you were focused on the rules and worshipping the structure rather than depending on God's mercy to save you. We show an enormous amount of faith when we recognize that we can't do anything to save ourselves and we give ourselves to God just the way we are. Jesus didn't tell us to stop living correctly. Jesus didn't give us a pass to do anything we wanted because we got a get out of Hell pass. Rather Jesus called us back into relationship with God. It seems that at times we tend to view God as the grumpy grandpa who likes war and tells us to shut up and sit down, whereas Jesus is the loving brother who comforts us and tells us it will be ok and that he will protect us from grandpa.

We started a discussion group this week talking about why people like Jesus but not the church. It got me thinking. What would Jesus say about us? Would He come back and say what he said about the religious leaders back then?

We have rules that many tend to think will be enough to get them to heaven. Many people view church as a place that tells you that you can't do certain things. Somehow the perception is that Jesus was a good man and did good things, so that makes him ok. But the church is mean and rigid and just plain boring.

I believe that those outside the church are equating the church with their view of God. God is about rules and gets mad at you and will kill you if you don't obey. But they view Jesus like Gandhi. He loved and accepted everyone.

What we must not forget is that Jesus is God. Jesus is God reaching out to man in love, in personal relationship. God is telling us that we must first love Him and then we must love our neighbor. Everything else comes from that. Why don't we kill people? We love them. Why don't we cheat on our spouses? We love them. Why don't we take God's name in vain? We love God. When you love someone you work within a relationship that is centered on respect and honor. Sin is a result of violating that love or failing to love. There is no mean God and good Jesus. They are the same. The God who created everything loves us and wants to have a personal relationship with us.

What about the God who destroyed entire cities? I'm still working on that. I suppose I would say that God is real. He isn't a computer program that works on a set bunch of rules. God changes with us. A real relationship impacts and changes both involved parties. I would guess that God was responding to the situation before Him in the way that was required to protect those who were following Him. Each situation requires a different response.

Is it really our place to judge God? "I love the idea of Jesus because he is all about love, but I can't go for the whole God thing because he wants you to obey and He punishes you if you mess up. Plus God killed all those people and I just can't follow a God that would do that." (Sarcasm intended)

Where I am at personally is that I know that I don't know or understand all of the circumstances that were involved when God killed others to protect Israel. I simply have to trust that God had valid reasons and that He is the loving God who wants a relationship with me.

Religion is about following a set of rules. If that is your thing then you must realize that you have created an idol and that you are not worshipping Yahweh. God is about a personal relationship. Our behavior is based on that relationship. The things we do or don't do are an expression of our love for God.

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The Wheels on the Bus go round and round

2011-08-27T08:09:00.001-06:00

This week I was finally able to get my new driver's license so I can drive a school bus. This process has been unique to say the least. I answered an ad in the paper and received no response. I called to check on the position and was transferred to the person doing the hiring. We scheduled an interview. I arrived and he didn't. He had a medical appointment than ran long. I finally left after waiting for 1 hour. We rescheduled. I answered a few basic questions and that was it. I needed to get my license. The trick was that I needed my medical card to get my license and he didn't want to pay for the card until he knew I could drive. I also couldn't find my birth certificate which was now required to get a new license. I had to order that and pay a hefty sum to get it. In the mean time I was allowed to attend their first aid and CPR training. We scheduled a date when I could take my school bus tests which would allow me to get my license and secure my job. I was allowed to practice a few skills prior to that and ride a route to learn the ropes.

I was very concerned with passing the test. There were a lot of details because it involves government safety regulations and children. I had to pass because this job was going to help support my ministry. I began studying a lot.

I did pass the test and was able to get my license. My next problem was that as a relief driver I have to know all of the routes and I don't know the area. They help you learn by having you ride 2 days and drive 3 days one route a week. I was worried that I wouldn't learn it because I don't know the area.

I have been riding one route and I have reviewed the maps like crazy. I have mapped out the route numerous times and last night I drove the route to make sure I had it memorized because I will be driving it next week. My concern continues as my bus looks like the one pictured and holds 60 - 70 kids. This route has a lot of young kids who don't know where they get off and they have a hard time listening. Not only do I have to pay attention to driving safely and getting the route right I have to keep the kids under control while doing it. Hearding cats comes to mind.

Now for the spiritual application.

I have spent a lot of time preparing for this job. I have studied and practiced. I have been concerned and I have taken it seriously. I have devoted free time to making sure I could do the job.

As Christians, Jesus has called us to tell others about Him. It's actually more than that. We are called to live in a tight relationship with God and build new relationships with others that will introduce them to how loving healthy relationships work and who God is as a result.

Many Christians don't do this. I'm not sure why. Could be fear, could be they figure someone else will do it, or they just don't know how. Like my job, we should be practicing and training to do the job God has called us to do.

I'm not that good at developing new relationships. I have a tendency to hold back because of past events in my life where I was mistreated. My first expectation is that people will make fun of me, because that is what I endured most of my time as a kid. I was the kid that ate alone. That got pushed around and shoved into lockers. I was the kid who changed his route home everyday to try and avoid getting jumped. Even the "good" kids rejected me at school. But God calls me to love my brother and God calls me to invest in people. So now I practice starting conversations and I practice being vulnerable even though I might get hurt. I take classes and I read books to learn how to better reach people and share the gospel with them.

Right now there are a lot of new people at my bus job. They are very friendly, but I can tell they aren't really into Jesus. My first test is to simply become friends. I must first earn their trust and the right to share with them. Over time I will look for opportunities to ask them what they think about certain things to get a conversation going and someday I know they will ask me what I think. It won't be because I am a pastor. It will be because I am their friend.

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When a sanctuary is not a sanctuary

2011-08-20T07:28:00.001-06:00

This past week my church removed the pews from the sanctuary and gave them to another church. We are replacing the pews with chairs to give greater flexibility to the room we worship in. This transition has created a few discussions.

Is the sanctuary a Holy place where we meet God? Are the objects within the sanctuary sacred? In the temple there was a place behind the curtain that was sacred and only priests could go there and there were special rules. There were other sections of the temple that were reserved for specific types of people.

In our churches it seems that we can over time assign a sacredness to the room in which we worship because that may be where we feel like we meet God. What was once brand new and put in a room for function over time becomes a part of the religious experience and is assigned importance.

When a room is called a sanctuary it takes on an air of being Holy or better than the other rooms of a church. But are we to say that God does not visit us in the children's room that has no pews or altar or remembrance table or piano or even a cross? What of the teens in their meetings? What of the people meeting in store fronts or banquet rooms or homes or under the big tree in the village?

What is required in a meeting place for God to visit us?

What God has revealed to me this week is that material objects are not sacred. We are. The building or place we meet is not the church. We are.

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A river runs through it

2011-08-13T08:17:00.002-06:00

In a river there are calm waters where as a fish you can hang out and there is fast moving water where as a fish you have to work hard to get where you want to go. In the calm waters you wait for food to come your way and there is less risk. In the fast waters you go after the food but there is a much higher risk of injury. Fisherman often fish in the calm waters because the fish are more likely to see the bait. But it seems you can get a more exciting catch if you can snag a fish at the edge of the fast water. This fish is moving faster and may put up more of a fight.

I can see this analogy going two ways. The fish in the calm water wait for life to come to them whereas the fish in the current go after life. Jesus as the fisherman has to dangle something really good in front of the fish in the calm water to even get them to move. He only has to get the fish in the fast water to see something that looks like food to get them.

There are people who rest in the comfort zone and wait for life to change around them. Jesus has to work hard to get them to move and do what He wants. The people who are always going tend to respond quickly to Jesus call but they don't always see it because they are too busy chasing life.

Now the second way you can see this is that the fish in the fast water who are serving God are always on the move. They get to places fast but it is hard for them to see anything other than what is right in front of them. The fish in the calm water can see the entire area and get rested for their next journey.

There is a time to be in calm waters so that we can hear God and prepare for the journey either upstream or downstream and there is a time to be in the current going where God wants us. It is a fast ride and a lot of work but can be pretty fun as well.

This week I worked on trying to get into calm waters but kept getting sucked out into the current. I now live in a very beautiful area and I need to make sure that I get out of the current long enough to enjoy it with my family.

The picture is of Paul from our church in the river by his house. Brian and I made a call on his house because he offered to let me store my motorhome there. Since there is a river right there, Brian had to take time to get at least a few casts in before we left. I think I could get used to living like this.

I'm not really a fisherman myself, so if my analogy of how fish are caught doesn't work, just go with the thought and see if God is telling you something.

Cleaning the house and arrival in Cody.

2011-08-05T23:28:00.000-06:00

This week we have spent most of our time cleaning our house. I really hate this part. Every time you get down to the last few items and the dirt, you just want to be done; but more and more stuff just keeps showing up.

When you move into a new home there is a certain excitement over what it will look like and that excitement can usually get us close to finishing that project. Cleaning up something that is ending is depressing and requires you to just push through.

This week my patience was certainly being tested and I know that wasn't on my best or kindest behavior. I didn't want to see the house anymore. I just wanted to be done. I didn't even do all or most of the work, but I still had had enough.

Now came the hard part for my wife. We had friends come over and help us move things out of our house. We knew that we had gotten behind on cleaning and hadn't done a deep cleaning for a couple years due to the many distractions in our lives. As we moved furniture, different areas of dirt or lost things came to light. Embarrassment ensued. You don't want your friends to think you are slobs. You don't want to be a slob. But after 15 years a house gets a number of scars and dust in the corners. If you don't want to have those scars or dust you have to do more than vacuum and dust. You have to move furniture and climb ladders and sometimes get help.

God showed me this week that our lives or bodies are like our houses. Over the years we end up with scars or junk in the corners. If we don't take the time to clean up, the junk just keeps building up. Most of the time we don't ask for help because we don't want people to know we aren't perfect. So everyone walks around afraid to share and seek help because others might know that we still need God.

When we clean our house it takes scrubbing walls and getting on our knees to scrub the floors. Sometimes we have to paint or replace flooring. It is never easy. It requires patience and fortitude to see it through. The same is true when we clean up our lives. It is not easy. Sometimes we have to let people see our dirt and help us.

Arrival in Cody
Tonight we arrived in Cody to start our first assignment as associate pastor. Many people have been asking if I was excited or ..how I felt. At the time I was just focused on getting the next thing done. Now I am here. Now I am sharing a house with another family. Now I have to find a job to take care of the financial obligations that remain.

Before these were all things that would sort themselves out when the time was right. Now that we are here, those issues are more real and pressing.

It will be challenging to work out disciplining kids with 2 sets of parents and different parenting styles. It will be challenging figuring out cooking and any other number of household management issues. And it will be challenging if a job does not present itself right away. There is no known backup plan.

I don't really need one though. God doesn't need us to back him up. Are we preparing just in case God fails to deliver? God will provide what my family needs because I am seeking what God wants not what I want.

Since this all began my family has been blessed in countless ways. We have been blessed by friends at our former church in Kuna, we have been blessed by friends at our former church, Valley Shepherd Nazarene, and we have been blessed by countless our friends, family members and complete strangers. Some have given to us what they themselves could not afford because they needed to obey God.

God has taken our situation and used it to allow others to bless us and they in turn were blessed by God. I have no reason to believe that won't continue to happen in Cody.

May God bless you and your family.

History

2011-07-29T23:32:00.001-06:00

This was my last week working for a company for whom I have had the pleasure of working for over 16 years. Who I have become during that time is a part of my story.

A big part of my history is intertwined with the Knight family. Brian Knight and I first began working together as youth sponsors at Valley Shepherd Naz around 1990. In 1992 I was without a place to go when I was looking for a staff position at a church. Brian's brother Kit let me move in with him and Brian's family gave me a job. I left to work as a janitor at Valley Shepherd in hopes that it would put me closer to getting a staff position. That didn't work and the Knights accepted me back and gave me a job again. A few years later I left again with the hopes that I could find a place to minister full time. I met my wife at that time and ended up working in a regular job. Brian Knight called and asked me to come work again at Central. After 7 years I was feeling the itch and left again; this time to start my own business. The Knights provided me a location to house my business and let me make payments on my lease when I had to close my business. I was feeling led to leave Valley Shepherd and Brian Knight kept encouraging me to come help him at Kuna Naz. The Knights also gave me a job once again. When the time came for me to enter full time ministry, guess who gave me a staff position. Yes, Brian Knight. Brian couldn't pay me but he is providing shelter by allowing us to live with his family.

For over 20 years the Knights have supported me and/or my family either as ministry partners or with an income. As I tell the story it reminds me of our relationship with God. Many time we leave God to do our own thing or try it our way, but God is always there ready to support us just like the Knights have done for me.

Have you ever noticed that history is kind of like his story or God's story. The Bible is the story of God and His relationship with us. God's interaction with the people in the Bible is a continuing relationship that He has with us.

Sometimes it seems as if what happened in the Bible is just some story that happened long ago and that God doesn't do that anymore or isn't even alive.

God's history or the Bible tells us how God interacts with us. It tells us how the relationship works and what we have to do in order to be who we were meant to be and to have joy and peace. Much of what we know about the world has been passed down from generation to generation. Most of this information is accepted, but many people don't want to obey God and decide that information provided in the same way about another subject is credible but anything about God is false.

Nonetheless, you can't run from God. You can ignore God. You can say no to God, but He will continue to reach out to you until you accept him. The lack of peace you have is the desire for God that He has placed in you. If you do not have peace then you are not where you are supposed to be and you are not obeying God.

Peace and joy come from being exactly where God wants you and letting God have full control of your life. If you hold anything back you will not have peace. You are not required to understand why God wants you to do something.

History. The Bible has countless examples like Abraham, David, Moses, Peter, Paul, and many more who struggled until they completely obeyed God. Their praises came from a realization that God provided everything they had. Their blessings came when they followed God and their struggles came when they didn't follow God.

God promises to be with us and to help us succeed at what He asks us to do. You are required to be willing and actively looking for God's answers. God provides everything else.

If you lack peace and joy, study history and learn how God provided it to his children.

May God bless you and keep you. May you give up all that you control and receive peace and joy.

May God continue to bless the Knights as they follow God and provide support for God's children.

How to have peace.

2011-07-23T08:01:00.000-06:00

I remember a time when I was probably 12. Our district had a winter family camp event every year. We lived in the Kansas district at that time, but since Kansas doesn't really have any mountains we had to travel to Horn Creek Colorado. The lodge had individual rooms for families and each room shared a bathroom with another room. I remember that was a big deal as a kid because you had to make sure you didn't walk in on someone else! At this camp you had to stay with your parents until you were old enough to stay with the teens in the cabin section of the campground. This year I was finally old enough to go stay with the big kids. They put you into cabins with a counselor just like a regular teen camp. It was a blast to get to go somewhere and not have to be with my parents all of the time.

Late one night the counselor walks into our cabin and suggests that our cabin sneak into the kitchen and get some ice cream. Everyone was excited and quickly dressed to go out to make the hike to the kitchen. I however stayed in my bed. As I thought about it, I knew it was wrong. The counselor asked my why I wasn't getting ready. I told him that I couldn't go. I told him that we didn't have permission to have the ice cream and that if we didn't have permission that it was the same as stealing and that I could not participate in any activity that involved stealing. You should have seen the look on that counselors face when a 12 year old sat there and refused to go get ice cream on moral grounds. He tried everything he could to get me to go. He finally gave up and left along with everyone else in my cabin. It was a lonely night but I felt comfort in knowing I had done the right thing.

Later the next day I found out that the entire youth camp had snuck out to get ice cream. I was the only person in that camp who did not accept the invitation to sneak into the kitchen to get ice cream. They had it planned and wanted to surprise the campers. My counselor didn't want to give the surprise away and so he couldn't tell me.

It still bothers me that the leaders of that camp would use the premise of sneaking in to get something without permission to get all of the campers to the dining hall for ice cream.

What exactly does that have to do with peace? I will get there. This is sort of a round about way of explaining that one of my areas of not having peace deals with my sense of responsibility. As you can see I was almost pharisee like with my devotion to the law as a child. My sense of responsibility required that I do all that I could to meet my obligations. Over the years it has lead to anxiety and great stress.

There have been times at work when I have felt great stress because I did not feel that I was doing as good of work as I should. I felt a great sense of failure because I knew that I could do better and I was discouraged that I wasn't. I felt that I was letting my boss down.

In 2005 I closed my own business. At that time I had hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt. I went 6 months without income and somehow managed to not have any late payments. I trusted God to take care of my family. I knew that God existed, but looking back now I didn't completely trust God to prevent my family from being homeless. I therefore took on the responsibility of making sure that I at least provided food and shelter for my family just in case.

How many times do we trust God with almost everything? God I know you can take care of everything, but I'm not sure if you are going to do this the way I want it so I will keep control of that part.

I just recently stumbled across what I believe to be the formula for peace. You can trust that God will give you everything you want if everything you want is to have God give you what he wants.

Many times we believe in God. We trust that God can take care of us, but we don't always trust God to do what we want and so we hold something in reserve. When we hold back something from God there is no peace. At least not the peace that God offers when you are completely in his presence and totally dependant upon Him. The answer is to change from asking God to give you what you want and then hoping and praying that you will get what you want and being disappointed or mad when you don't to praying that God will give you exactly what he wants.

Let's look at it this way. Suppose that you want to live if a big nice house with all of the trappings that go with it but God wants you to live in a hut with no running water. You don't want to live in a hut so you set out to get what you want on your own. You eventually get that big house but something is missing. Your family constantly fights, you can't seem to find any peace or joy. That is because God is not involved. You rejected God's plan and set out on your own. Whereas you could live in the hut surrounded by God's presence and full of joy and peace. Which do you prefer? Comfort without God or struggle with God.

This time I learned to give God everything that I have. I am not worried about what I want. My entire focus is on making sure that God communicates to me clearly so that I can do what He wants in the way He wants it. My only concern is making sure that I hear God and since what I want to do is follow His direction I am confident that God will make sure that I hear Him.

What is it that you are holding back? Is there something you don't trust God to do the way you want it? The key is to stop worrying about whether God will do it the way you want it and start doing everything the way God wants it. Trust that allowing God to give you what He wants will always be better even if it involves struggles along the way or doesn't look like anything you would have expected. I always figure it is better to be nowhere and with God than somewhere without God.

Peace happens when we no longer struggle with God. When our answers to God involve yes then we find peace.

I encourage you to try this prayer. God, please provide my family what you want to provide my family. Help us to be who you want us to be and to have what you want us to have. Help us to want what you want us to have. Amen.

It is not a silver bullet. It does take time because God has to shape you and mold you to where you are able to be who you should be. But you must start with yourself. You must find peace first. You must start down the road of maturity.

Satan's Greatest Weapon: FEAR

2011-07-16T09:49:00.001-06:00

I believe that most of us live in a constant struggle with Satan. There are times that Satan will deceive us into believing things that are not true so that we will react improperly. He will convince us to go ahead and do what is wrong because God will forgive us later. Sometimes he just simply gets us to not care. But his biggest weapon by far is that of fear.

Using fear, Satan is a constant voice in our head. You are not good enough. You don't look good. People don't like you. You are not a hard worker. You are worthless. You make everyone unhappy. You are unhappy. You aren't providing for your family. You need something else to make you happy.

I believe that most of us hear that voice that makes us feel less than we are.

God however has the power to provide us peace and power over Satan.

Isaiah 41:10 (NIV)
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Once we give God complete control of our lives there is nothing to fear. God does not want us to fail. God can use us no matter what we are like or who we are or what our abilities are if we simply do what he asks us to do. Our peace comes from knowing that we don't have to worry about messing up or being less than we are supposed to be. We seek God's help in providing us the ability to do what He requires.

The prayer that I currently have is that God will provide my wife and I the jobs we require to serve in ministry and be the family that God desires. We keep looking at different jobs and many times they involve weekends or late night shifts or something like that. The temptation could be to think that we might end up with jobs that will keep us from our kids or from having time to work at the church. However, that thought is counter intuitive when you look at my prayer. Does God desire that we serve in him ministry? Yes. Does God desire that we live as a family in a way that is a testimony to God's love and grace? Yes. If those are both true and my prayer is that God will provide jobs that let us do what God desires then why would God only provide jobs that do the opposite.

The key here is that if your desire is to do what God desires your desires will be fulfilled. Fear goes away when everything that you want to be and accomplish is focused on God. God wants you to succeed and if your desire is to do what He wants then He is certainly going to help you with that. Fear comes into play when we try and do things on our own.

If you desire to have peace in your life, I challenge you to begin praying that you will serve God and that you will be able to focus on doing what God desires.

How to be blessed

2011-07-09T07:31:00.000-06:00

I have spent 13 weeks talking about how God was blessing me in the process of moving from volunteer to pastor. It would seem appropriate this week to explain what a blessing is and how you can receive God's blessing on your life.

From various dictionaries you will find that a blessing is the bestowing of something holy, divine will, or hope or approval. Grace Notes by Warren Doud explains that the greek word actually means praise.

In my experience the first thing that you have to do to receive a blessing is to ask for the blessing or request that God bless someone. The next step is that you need to begin looking for the blessing. Believe that God will bless you. You should also begin looking for ways that you can bless other people.

For the last 3 months I have known that I was leaving my job. My employer changed my responsibilities which made it easier, but it was still difficult at times to want to work when I knew I was moving on. I began to focus on trying to be a blessing to someone at work that day. I decided I would try and do something that would enrich their lives. I did some of the less desirable jobs. I tried to work harder instead of just standing around. My focus changed from not wanting to be there to looking for ways to make other people's lives better. I believe that is the reason why I was able to last as long as I did. I now have another month left before we move. This week has been tough. I need to remember to focus on blessing other people again.

God blesses us each and every day. We just don't see it. Everything we have is from God. Did you eat today? Then God blessed you. Start by being thankful for the every day blessings you receive. Be thankful for having food & shelter. Be thankful for having a car. Be thankful for having money to buy gas. Be thankful for your family. By starting small you will begin to see how God is blessing you in bigger ways. It will also prepare you to see how what could appear to be bad is actually a blessing.

When my boss told me that I only had 13 weeks of work left I could have taken that badly. Instead I saw it as a blessing from God and it certainly has been. Now my boss is letting me work until I move. Another month of income! What a tremendous blessing that is.

When it became clear that I wasn't going to be serving at our current church I could have felt badly about that and reacted negatively. I could have behaved in such a way that it would have caused problems within that church body. Instead I again saw it as a blessing because God was answering my prayer and was making it clear to me that I had been called elsewhere. Now I can be a blessing to that church instead of a curse.

When something happens that hurts or has the potential to hurt take a step back and look at the situation. Many times God is simply answering our prayers in ways that we didn't expect and like children we are tempted to complain and throw a fit about how unfair it is. If we do that we fail to recognize that God is simply doing what is best for us.

Another important thing is to pray correctly. Don't pray for the red sports car or for the 10,000 sq ft house or the 200" HDTV. Pray for God's blessings. My current prayer is this. "Dear God, please provide the jobs that my wife and I need to support our ministry and will support our ability to live as a family in the way you desire." I could ask for the job that makes me a lot of money, but what if the hours don't let me serve at the church or spend time with my family? The best prayers are the ones that ask God to provide what you need to do what God wants you to do. God doesn't usually say no when you pray that he will provide what you need to do what he wants you to do. But you must be prepared for the answer.

God will bless you when you pray for it, but it will often be in ways you don't expect. I began praying for God's will and for a blessing; I lost my job, we are losing our house, we are moving away from family, we are leaving the church we love, we are leaving our dog with family, we are going to have to live with another family. The list goes on of the things my family is giving up because God is blessing my family. We have a choice. We can believe that God is punishing us or mistreating us and complain and be depressed or we can see it for what it is. God is changing our lives and removing those things that stand in our way of serving where He needs us. God sometimes has to take away the things we are attached to so that we are able to focus on Him.

If you are brave enough, pray that God will prepare you to serve him. Not everyone will be called to be a pastor, but you are called to tell those you know about God. Ask God to bless you and help you be a witness to those around you. Do it earnestly and your life will be changed forever. Many things will be more difficult but the blessings that God bestows upon you will greatly outweigh everything else.

You must also recognize that many times God's blessing is the ability to cope with the changes He has brought upon you. I used to be crippled with depression and self-doubt. Now I am filled with joy and confidence. I see and understand the difficulties for what they are. I still suffer the consequences of things that must happen, but God provides exactly what I need to survive it.

May the Lord bless you, and keep you;

May the Lord make His countenance shine upon you, and be gracious to you;

May the Lord turn His countenance to you and grant you peace.

Numbers 6:24-26

Week 13 - God has spoken!

2011-07-02T06:53:00.000-06:00

It is now the 13th week and God has kept His promise! We now know where God has called us to serve.

God has called me to serve as an associate pastor at the Cody Wyoming Church of the Nazarene. Many times I have prayed that God would allow me to do something where I had to depend completely on Him and that everything that happened would point toward God. Now is that time.

God has clearly been answering prayers.

I prayed that God would make it clear to me whether I should continue working for my current employer. My employer met with me soon thereafter and told me that God had told him to give me 13 weeks at my current job.

I prayed that God would help me lose weight. My employer also told me that he was paying for a personal trainer to help me. I didn't even mention my prayer to him! I have lost 35 pounds so far.

I prayed that God would make what church we were called to very clear. It took all 13 weeks but the answer as to what church God wanted us to serve was unmistakeable. This was difficult because our hearts and our hopes were to serve where we have been attending, but it is clear that God has something else planned for them. We are confident that God will provide for the Kuna Church of the Nazarene and we still hold everyone there close to our hearts.

That is some of the answers to prayer and some of the blessings we have received so far; there are many more prayers and potential blessings to come.

The Cody Church of the Nazarene is unable to provide a salary that will provide for my family. God has called my family to bless this church by offering to serve and provide our own income for the time being. This will be difficult, but I am confident that God will richly bless my family.

We plan on arriving in Cody during the second week of August, 2011. At this time we do not have jobs and we will share the parsonage with the Cody Pastor. It will be a cozy arrangement as our children will have to share rooms together as my wife and I take the guest bedroom. It's a good thing we are close friends!

We won't be able to afford our house here in Idaho and so we are starting the process to do a short sell and if that doesn't work we will have to turn it back into the bank. This has been our most difficult area to allow God control. My wife and I have always enjoyed good credit. We have never had a late payment, even when we went 6 months without any income 6 years ago. This month we have had to make the difficult choice to not make our mortgage payment and we are in the process of canceling all other extra utilities and services we have enjoyed.

There are potentially many negatives here and Satan has certainly tried and continues to try and use them against us. We are stepping out in faith and expecting God to deliver in such a way that His name will be glorified and praised by all who know us. This has brought us under constant attack either through doubt and fear or even sometimes by unknowing 3rd parties. Each person in our family is being confrontred by something different. This has been pretty easy for me as I have been able to clearly see where God is leading us. I had been able to predict what was most likely going to happen weeks in advance. My wife has had to rely on me and trust me. God did not provide her the same information until we visited the Cody church for an interview. At that time things started to fall into place for her, but she still is having to rely on my direction. Not only is this stretching her faith in God but in me. How many wifes would go along with their husband telling them that God is taking his job away, taking their house away, asking them to move 900 miles to a smaller community, live with another family, work for another church without pay, and that she needs to stop homeschooling the children and get a job herself? What I have had to ask my wife to endure is beyond belief. My children are pretty cool with it so far. They are focused on the new things they will enjoy. Their time will come sometime after we move. Then we will need lots of prayer once the new situation becomes the current situation.

I believe and trust that God will provide what my family needs. My prayer is that God will provide us the jobs that allow us to do the ministry he has called us to do, raise our children the way God wants us to raise our children, and live as a family the way God wants us to live. I believe God will answer this prayer positively. As long as we say yes to God and live the way he wants us to live, we have nothing to fear. God might not provide the fanciest of houses, God might not provide the most glamorous jobs, God might not provide the fastest cars, but I believe that God will provide exactly what my family needs.

Many material items that we struggle our entire lives to have fail to enrich our lives or help us live for God. I don't expect God's blessings to be riches; I expect His many blessings will be based on relationships.

Some of our friends have wanted to know how to help. One thing my family is having to learn is how to stop being self-sufficient on everything. We are usually so focused on trying to bless other people and meet their needs that we neglect to let others be blessed by helping us. I'm not really sure what needs to list because we are so use to finding our own solutions. I am simply going to list what tasks remain. If God directs you to help in some way then we will try and learn to let you help. If you know of someone else who may have the resources that might provide a blessing for our family then we will do our best to let them bless us so that they will be blessed in return. One certain way you can bless us is to simply pray that God will protect us from the evil one and that God will provide exactly what we need.

Our first task is getting our house ready to sell it. We are currently moving boxes and packing what we won't need to live over the next month. We are going to paint some of the walls in our house because after 15 years in the same house with children, they aren't that pretty. We need to also paint the baseboards and clean all of the walls and cabinets. We should replace the flooring but that will just have to make do. I just can't bring myself to spend too much more money on a house that we have to give back to the bank. But my pride kind of wishes I could bless the next family with nice floors to start. There is a back door I put into our garage that was not installed properly. It works, but I would like to have it actually work correctly for the next family.

Our second task will involve a yard sale. We need to sell what we can't take with us or don't need.

Our third task will involve moving. We will have a full truck, 2 cars, and a motorhome. My father wants to help us move so we will most likely make it work by using a U-haul & tow dolly, Motorhome & trailer w/van on it, and his pickup. Once in Cody we will need to unload most of our possessions into a storage facility. We will need to pack for long term storage and for the few items we can fit into the house we will be sharing.

Our fourth task which doesn't necessarily fall in this order is finding jobs that allow Marlane and I the ability to serve God at the same time.

Our fifth task is to eventually find our own housing. This may take awhile because the housing market there is very expensive with the combination of low paying jobs. We may need to save up money for a while or work our way up to better jobs before we can afford our own house.

Our sixth and final task is to bless the Cody church of the Nazarene and the community of Cody. Our goal is to not just grow the church. Our goal is to find a way to help its members grow closer to God and learn how to mentor their friends and share the good news about Jesus with their friends. My desire is to learn how to help a church grow in a significant way that will impact the city of Cody and the surrounding areas. May God use me to richly bless those I encounter.

The focus of this blog will begin changing from this journey I have been on and how God was blessing me to how God continues to bless me and others. If God has blessed you please share with me. If you are willing to let others know, comment on one of the posts.

Week 12

2011-06-25T08:15:00.001-06:00

God is beginning to give us answers to our questions. I hope I can share more information about a staff position next week. We are waiting for some details to be finalized to make it official.

It has become clear that we will most likely need to give up our house. We were faced with this 6 years ago and we were able to save the house and not have any late payments. We were very stressed out about it at that time. This time there is peace. It isn't easy but God is calming our spirits.

One big issue for pastors is making sure that you don't have debt that will prevent you from going where God needs you. Our house is the only thing standing in our way. We have decided that everything we have is God's. If He wants us to keep the house or any other material possession then He will provide the income to do it. If the money is not there then we will let the house go. We will have met our responsibilities by doing everything we can to follow God, but going outside His will to earn the money to keep the house would put us in a house but outside of God's plan. I would rather not have a house and be where God wants me to be.

Next week is the last week of the 13 weeks of blessings. I plan to continue to list the blessings that God provides each week. Next week may be a very big entry as I hope to finally share exactly what is happening.

God's blessing this week was an answer regarding the house and peace regarding what that means.

Week 11

2011-06-22T22:44:00.000-06:00

This week God answered our prayers in another clear and concise way that had the potential to hurt if you let it. Another door closed this week in terms of ministry opportunity. I had already sensed that God was not calling us to this particular church, but a conversation with the pastor of that church caused us to pause and spend some time waiting to make sure. Any time someone says they have chosen someone else our initial reaction is to feel that they are commenting on your value. I choose to see God at work. If I had several churches all seeking me at the same time it would be difficult to know who to choose.

We move on and continue seeking the church that God is preparing for us.

It seems that many times Christians get upset or feel that God is mistreating them if they don't see things going their way or if God does not let them in on the plan from the beginning. Instead we must understand that God is working on the plan and working with other people to get things ready for you. We must also understand that sometimes people say no to God and He must create another plan.

God's plan for my life and that of my family has been in the works for over 20 years and more specifically in the last 11 weeks. As I mentioned before, I believe that God has kept me from knowing everything so that I would keep working hard and so that my family would have to rely on him for everything. Thankfully it seems that God is starting to let me in on the plan. I can't share everything yet because there are still some details to work out. Keep checking in to find out what happens as I expect the biggest blessings to happen in the last couple of weeks.

Week 10

2011-06-10T22:43:00.000-06:00

I'm not sure that words can express the blessings that I have encountered this week. God used me to proclaim his message of salvation to almost 100 children. Our church held VBS this week. God's spirit was definitely present and I must give him the glory. There were many people involved who spent countless hours preparing and I am very thankful for all who stepped out and helped make it all happen.

Last night I was able to invite the children to invite Jesus into their hearts. Our count is that about 35 children received Jesus last night. I can't fully express the joy that I feel or the honor that feel that I was able to be a small part of their decision. The fact that God would allow me to be his instrument in making this happen overwhelms me.

Today nothing went right. There was a heavy spirit on my heart. I missed my appointment with my trainer because I was distracted and drove right by my turn off and got onto the freeway. By the time I could get back to where I needed to be it was too late. An appointment I was supposed to have at work in another city took me 2 hours to get there one way. I didn't know that the client had rescheduled. I spent the entire day driving to and from an appointment that did not happen. It also cost my company a fair amount of money. I arrived at VBS tired and my spirit was troubled. I could not shake it. I began praying for God to make things happen. That He would provide the words. It seems that God did speak through me tonight. After VBS two girls wanted to talk to me. They wanted advice. One needed help because her parents were not saved. She had accepted Jesus but knew she hadn't been doing the right things. God provided me the words to speak to her. Another girl suffered from depression and often heard a voice telling her that she was not worthy. Again God provided me the words.

Although the entire day was a struggle, I pulled through with the power of Jesus. I was allowed to share God's wisdom. It is another confirmation that God has indeed called me into ministry. When I am serving in ministry I know I am where I am supposed to be.

There are a few weeks left until my full time job ends and there isn't an answer for how we will make money in the future. For me I feel liberated. I have dealt with what could happen if I don't have a paying job. I can handle the worst case scenarios. Because of that I feel free to serve God wherever He calls. My life and the life of my family and all of my possessions are in God's hands. If I need something I know that God will provide me the means to earn the money to provide it or it will be provided some other way. If I don't need it, I won't miss it.

I wish to take this opportunity to thank my employer, Kit Knight, for listening to God and for blessing me and my family. It is an honor and a privilege to have worked for his family all of these years and to know that they love me and support my ministry.

Week 9

2011-06-04T08:16:00.001-06:00

Sometimes little actions can be a blessing to others. This week I realized that by following the advice of my trainer and working hard during our workouts I was blessing him. Many times people sign up for trainers and pay for it but then they don't show or they don't follow the program. Some people figure that if they are paying for it that they can do what they want.

Imagine that your job is to help other people improve their lives and you have the answers but then those who hire you to help them don't do anything you tell them to do. I imagine that at times we have all been there either in our jobs or with our kids. We can see the answer and we know what needs to happen to solve their problem, but they just wont listen. That is frustrating for all of us. I am glad that my obeying my trainer is blessing him and showing him that there are some who can do it. It also gives me the opportunity to explain that it is with God's help.

Now imagine how God feels when He has the answer for us and we refuse to obey Him. In my online class this week we have been discussing churches and their effectiveness at evangelism. The primary obstacle appears to be that people in the church are usually preoccupied with their situation and don't have the desire to reach out to others because they are afraid or because it would be too much work.

The church won't grow with the pastor being responsible for inviting new people, but many times the people in the church are unwilling to train or workout to improve their relationship with God or to learn how to tell others about Jesus. The pastor is left with a vision of what the church could be like and the reality that unless his church obeys it will never reach it.

I have been telling my children that they should obey even if it isn't fair or isn't their turn because it teaches them to obey God even when it doesn't seem fair. How many times as adults do we disobey God simply because it might require sacrifice or because it doesn't seem fair?

I challenge you this week to open your heart and mind to what God might be asking you to do and obey Him.

Week 8

2011-05-28T08:46:00.001-06:00

We are now past the half way point. A couple of my last entries were a little vague because I couldn't tell the whole story. I still can't. Sometimes respecting relationships and honoring others requires us to not share everything that happens in our lives.

What I can share is that Satan continues to attack. He uses my weaknesses and oftentimes the fears of my family. Sometimes you just don't want people to think you are crazy. But with God's help I have been able to fight back and maintain an outlook that sees the blessings that God is bestowing on my family.

Missionaries often go to unknown situations and live in less than ideal circumstances. Sometimes they even put their lives in danger. They give up almost all that they own or they make arrangements to be gone for awhile. We see that as honorable and we are proud of them for making the sacrifice. We believe that God will provide for them. How does God provide? Sometimes missionaries die horrible deaths. Sometimes they live in very bad conditions. God does not primarily provide physically but spiritually. Those who suffer the most receive the greatest measure of grace.

I believe that God is calling me to be a missionary here in the states. I don't know where that will be yet. I know that there is a real possibility that my family will have to give up most of what we own just like someone going to another country. What confuses me is that many people feel sorry for me and act as if I am trying to use my faith to keep from facing the reality that I am going to be unemployed. What greater honor could I have than to suffer for God? Yes, my family will suffer as well and that is difficult to deal with but I can't take away their opportunity to see God at work.

Some of our greatest heroes from the Bible were ordinary people who went against the grain and gave it all to God. Paul spent years in prison and kept preaching. The church didn't always listen to him either. These heroes were often misunderstood and often overlooked. What made they so great? They eventually obeyed God.

I don't expect to be a hero or a well known Christian leader. I just want to be known as a man who obeyed God.

Week 7

2011-05-21T23:26:00.001-06:00

This has been a week of highs and lows. My family is having to face the fact that we all have issues to resolve. Satan is using our weaknesses to try and tear us down. He is actively trying to pit us against one another and in some ways we wouldn't normally expect. It is easy to say that we know that Satan will attack us when we dedicate our lives to serving God, but how he does it can often be very unexpected. It is another thing to recognize how easy he can twist things to help us fall into his trap.

The good news is that God provided hope regarding a source of income. It is not definite and there are many questions, but it is nice to think of something positive even if you know it may not happen.

It is important to look for the positives in your life rather than why it isn't the way you wanted it.

Week six

2011-05-14T12:13:00.000-06:00

I can't help but shake my head and smile at this week. I was able to clear up a communication problem I had with a friend of mine and it is good to be able to speak freely with that person again. But on the other hand I am almost back to the same place I was in week one.

I thought I had started to figure out where God was going to send my family. Just knowing where it might be gave us some comfort as we started preparing. Then God changed a few things so that we are back in the same situation. We don't know for sure where God is calling us to serve. None of the possible ministry opportunities that we are aware of provide an income that will support us. All require a large sacrifice. What it boils down to is that it seems that God wants my family to be willing to go anywhere, do anything, and have nothing without knowing where that place is, what we would do there, and what we would have there.

While it is a struggle at times to not try and guess and figure it out, I am confident that God has the best interests in my family at heart. I trust that if my family is willing to sacrifice everything that God will sustain us. I don't say that God will make our lives wonderful. In fact our lives could be very difficult, but God will be there with us.

Another blessing is that I was able to mention my situation to my personal trainer this week. I had been wanting to clue him in on what was happening in my life for a while and I finally had the courage this week. What God is currently doing in my life is giving me an open door to talk about God to people who I would not normally discuss God with.

I continue to lose weight although it has been slower the last couple of weeks since I attended a company party and we had a cake on Mother's day. But some of my eating habits are changing and I am getting closer to having lost 30 pounds. My hope remains that I will be able to lose 100 pounds by the end of my training. It probably isn't realistic since it has taken 4 weeks to lose 30 pounds, but you never know I might be able to get close and I celebrate each time the scale drops into the next number group.

Week Five

2011-05-07T10:10:00.000-06:00

This has been an interesting week filled with highs and lows. Let's start with the low.

Communication. Why is it that we sometimes fail so miserably at clearly expressing what we are feeling or what we think? The past 2 weeks it seems that I failed to properly communicate what was happening and to properly involve others in my possible plans. The path that God has called me to is impacting a large number of people. I simply hadn't considered involving other people in the decisions that I believe God has called me to make. Yes, I included my wife, but there were other people who have a vested interest in my life that I didn't include.

I am blessed that there are many forgiving and patient people around me who are willing to let me fail and not cast me aside.

Since my sanctification I have had to focus on changing my behaviors and reactions. My tendency used to be to seal myself off to insure that I couldn't feel anything so that no one could hurt me. Doing this prevented me from feeling much of anything or doing much of anything. No risk, no reward. I knew I had just been existing and would someday die having barely lived.

Learning how to live when you have not done so in the past can get kind of messy. I am trying to learn how to properly share how I feel. How much is too much, how much is too little? So far it has been more of too much and too little and not enough of just right, but I am confident that I will improve. Continue to pray for those who have to experience this with me!

The point is that we can't be afraid of trying to improve. We can't be afraid of failure or even potentially upsetting those we love. We must do our best to do what is right and learn from those mistakes.

One of the biggest blessings this week is that I was able to talk to a couple of guys at work about what God is doing in my life. I have often felt like a failure for not talking to my co-workers about God on a regular basis. Isn't it amazing how Satan can make us feel guilty for not doing what he doesn't want us to do! The class I am taking right now was even discussing our fear of telling others about Jesus. I knew I had missed one chance, but instead of beating myself up I began praying that God would give me another opportunity and that I would have the confidence and courage to talk to them.

(Both guys just started working with me this week.) It turns out that one guy just moved into the area to help out at a local church. He moved here with no job in sight and is living with the pastor he is helping. He got a job helping me the same day he got here! This was very ironic to me because my job will be ending and my wife and I are still waiting to see where God wants us to serve and where we will work if the church God provides can't afford to pay us. The other guy recently served some time in prison but listened and has joined the conversation a couple of times.

Since the switch in roles in my company I have now had the opportunity to talk about Jesus to 3 different people! I can think of no greater blessing than to share the Good News with others.

Week Four

2011-04-30T08:08:00.000-06:00

The blessing for this week centers around a discussion I had with a person who ended up only working for our company about 3 days. We were driving from one location to another when we began discussing church. We were able to discuss a couple of different things regarding God's grace and the proper role of works. We also discussed a friend of his and her view of Christanity and what that meant.

This was a big deal to me because one barrier I have had in the past is talking about God to other people outside the church. This has been very troubling to me since I am called to be a pastor. This time however, it was a very natural conversation that was actually started by the other individual. He knew that I was leaving my current employment and preparing for full time ministry. This lead to him naturally wanting to discuss religion.

The moral of the story here is that we can create opportunities if we simply let people know how God impacts our life. How many times do we attend a great church service on a Sunday but refrain from telling anyone about it? Everyone else shares their weekend adventures yet we hesitate to share about our good times in the church.

This next week I begin an online class about Preaching the Gospel. The first lesson is about overcoming our fear to share the gospel! God certainly has very good timing!

Week Three

2011-04-27T21:04:00.000-06:00

This week was more about my family then it was about me. I discovered that although my past experiences have prepared me for my journey that each family member is in a different place in this journey. God is working with them on their own issues to help prepare them for what is to come.

I am recognizing that a part of the reason for the length of time involved here is so that God can work with my family as a whole to prepare them for our future ministry.

The primary focus again appears to be fear.

Many of us don't fear that God exists or that God loves us, but we often fear if God will do something or if we will know what to do.

It is my experience that if we pray that God's plan will happen; it always does if we are willing to follow it. There are times when we pray for certain things on our behalf and God sometimes has to say no because it does not fit what is supposed to happen for us. I think many of us can accept that. Now comes to the part where we fear that we won't do the right thing or that God won't clearly communicate what we are supposed to do.

In my situation I knew that God had finally given me permission to focus on ministry full time. I began praying that God would make it clear to me whether I was supposed to stay at my current job or if I was supposed to move on and being working on something else. He answered very clearly by having my boss tell me I had 13 weeks left. I could have very easily felt discouraged and felt like God was not helping me. I am trying to serve God and now I lose my job? That would have been very foolish since God was simply answering my prayer in a way that could not be misunderstood.

The question that remains for my family is if we will know what we are supposed to do to make God's plan for us happen. We begin to doubt ourselves. What God made clear this week is that if He is going to make a plan for our lives and we are willing to follow it, he is not going to set us up for failure. God wants us to succeed. Just as God made it clear regarding the job, God will make it clear regarding what church God has called us to, when and if to send out resumes, where to find new jobs if work outside the church is required, where to find new housing if required, what to do with our current house and other debts if required, and anything else that might impact God's plan for us.

It is in faith that God will not let us fail in following his plan that we can have peace and joy. We can relax in the spirit and work hard on what is in front of us if we continually seek God's guidance and we are willing to do what God requires.

The blessing this week is that we can rest in the spirit even when the future is unknown and full of risks. I am also very close to having lost 20 pounds. I don't really see a difference, but my clothes feel different and the scale confirms it.

Week Two

2011-04-27T21:03:00.000-06:00

Week two is over! I have spent most of the week lifting, stretching, and sweating both at work and in the gym. I have lost 10 pounds so far. I think I have gained some muscle so the loss of fat is probably higher than that. It is nice to have clothes fit a bit better.

God has impressed upon me that my material possessions are meaningless. Should my couch or my bed be of greater concern than preaching God's word and helping someone find Jesus? Should I not be willing to give up all that I have just for the opportunity to help someone change their life forever? I am concerned about keeping my promise to my creditors and I continue to pray that God will let me meet those obligations even if I am unable to use the items I am paying for. In the end if God decides that I am not able to do that then I will trust God to take care of it because everything I have is His.

My spirit is still strong. God is not only reminding me of the blessings that I am experiencing now, but blessings that I have received even during the most difficult situations.

This week I had to go to court to defend myself against someone who was suing me because I was the chairman of the board for a charter school for a short time when they opened and I had signed the contract the school did not pay. The judge threw out the suit against me. The blessing is that one of the board members who came on after I left said some nice things to me. The founders of this school had said some not so nice things about me when I left. This person said that he came to understand that I did all that I could and that I was a righteous person. I also met those same founders who had said some unkind things about me and I had no problem holding a normal conversation with them. God had already helped me forgive them long ago.

Keep checking in. I think it is going to get interesting as God starts to put his plan into place!

Week One

2011-04-27T21:01:00.000-06:00

This is the story of thirteen weeks that will change the life of my family and possibly my church forever. After twenty years of hoping that God would allow me to fulfill my call as a pastor, God has given me the approval to move forward. What follows is a journal of the blessings my family receives during the next thirteen weeks as God prepares our place of ministry.

As soon as I knew that I was going back into the ministry I informed my employer of my decisions. I didn't know when or how long it would be until I left, but I knew that I was going to leave eventually. My employer is a fellow Nazarene, a former roommate, and I have worked for his family for about 18 years. He began praying for me and the direction of his company. After taking some time off he had received a revelation from God. I was to be moved from my management position and focus on projects that would benefit the company for the next 13 weeks. After that time, I would no longer be guaranteed that there would be work available or a paycheck.

The first reaction I get from telling people that my employer has given me 13 weeks of employment is that they can't believe someone would do that. I imagine that they are concerned for my welfare and that of my family. It is important to point out that my employer is like a brother to me and has been a friend for almost 20 years. His family is my second family and they have provided me more than I deserve.

My friend's family has helped me with professional help with ADD and when I was depressed. They helped me when I owned my own business and welcomed me back when I closed it and helped me with some of the debt that I owed them since they were also supporting my business.

This has not been an easy decision for my friend as he is also concerned about my future, but he is also confident that God is directing both of us during this 13 weeks.

My purpose in sharing during this 13 weeks is so that others might learn that in the face of the unknown there are many blessings and instead of facing that unknown with fear and interpretation we should grab a hold of God's blessings and promises and act boldly in confidence that God loves us and keeps his promises.

The first blessing is that my employer is assisting me with a gym membership and a personal trainer to help me lose weight. He believes that he is also supposed to help me lose at least 30 pounds in the next 13 weeks. So far I am at about 6 pounds, but that fluctuates quite a bit so we shall see.
As I worked through this first week, my primary goal was to bless those I worked with at the stores I was assisting. I did my best to do the jobs that no one else would want to do. It wasn't easy and it wasn't pleasant. It was also different to go from being in charge to taking direction from those I used to give direction. I suppose it was important to be an example of humbleness to my co-workers.

The primary blessing this week was perseverance. I had to work harder physically than I had in many years; I survived my first training sessions; and I had to humble myself and not be in charge.

God does not ask us to just do the easy things. Many times it is the hardest things that teach us the most. God called me into the ministry over 20 years ago. Then I was told to wait. I waited and I waited and I waited. I didn't always wait well. I sometimes tried to hurry God up. I even took a job as a janitor in my church so that I would have a better chance to get a paid ministry position. You have to be very earnest in your desire to serve God if you are willing to clean church bathrooms just to have the chance! God has now made it clear to me that it is time to serve full time and he is taking away my security blanket to make sure that I understand that. Prior to this I wasn't sure if I was supposed to keep working and just keep volunteering while working on my license or if I would work part time, or if God had a full time position in mind. Now it is very clear. I prayed for a clear path and it has been given to me. Not only that but God spoke to my employer who has given me 13 weeks to seek that position with pay! I could have chosen to feel defeated and wonder why God would be so cruel as to put me in this position, but then I would be blaming God for answering my prayer instead of praising him and thanking him for such a great blessing.